Watermelon Sugar High and Other Random Hallucinations

 

 

Harry Styles Performing, "Watermelon Sugar" on the Grammy Awards, March 14, 2021

Following Harry Styles' first ever Grammy win in the category of Best Pop Solo Performance for "Watermelon Sugar," Sony Records should have been quite pleased with the results of their relentless PR campaign of mass deception throughout 2020-21. Headlines similar to the one below reappearing at periodic intervals to amplify the message and steer the public away from any kind of independent interpretation to take hold:

What Is 'Watermelon Sugar' About? Harry Styles On The Meaning And Lyrics

11 May 2021, 09:43 CapitalFM

 

 

This week the Brit Awards also recognized "Watermelon Sugar" as the Best Single of the year (2020) at Tuesday's ceremony on May 11. And it wasn't just the awards, and the No. 1 Billboard achievement, that should have brought a smirk smile to the label's collective, self-satisfied faces. Rather, the grand accomplishment of convincing the general public that the "subliminal" meaning behind one of the gayest songs ever was actually about Harry's insatiable het appreciation of oral sex, is a feat truly worthy of a different kind of prize. One that starts with the letter "B" and ends with the letter "T". But, then again, that may explain why Harry wore that banana-shaped phallic pendant, or what has been fondly referred to as his "dick" accessory, on both nights - perhaps a cheeky reminder of what the real meaning is behind the song's fruity inspiration. "I don't know if I could ever live without," indeed, Harry.

The tubular pendant might even help to explain yesterday's massive dump of some fairly provocative unseen photos from Harry's November 16 2019 Saturday Night Live hosting/musical guest gig. Images that hardly supported Sony's subsequent hard sell narrative about how much, "Harry loves to celebrate oral sex with lots and lots of women."

Ever see a sashaying watermelon? Work it, Harry!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mouth open, ready to "taste" it

It's so wonderful and warm

And it sounds just like a song

Breathe me in, breathe me out

Getting washed away in you

Well, hello there, Cowboy

 

That's right, eighteen months after they were taken, these and many more pics (outtakes) from an SNL photoshoot appear on Twitter, almost like there might have been an embargo until after the 2020 music awards season. Hmm, seems like Sony may not have liked the possible counter narrative of Harry just being Harry. They also probably didn't much appreciate that he failed to thank Sony or his management team during his Brit acceptance speech last week either. Instead, Harry chose to show his gratitude to the fans and, this time, certain someones behind the scenes,

"I want to thank my friends for being so generous to me always. And everyone in my life who has my back. 

Thank you so much. I love you...."

 

"I love you."

Or, besides the possibility of a photo embargo newly lifted, these SNL outtakes might have been portending some new hammer about to drop relative to a certain tabloid fauxmance, which will remain nameless for obvious reasons. The prospect of another humiliating, four-month old "candid" waddling "penguin" video, targeted to provoke more fandom dismay, and just plain face-palming embarrassment, clearly cannot be ruled out either.  Especially, given Sony's past track record when it comes to exploiting marketing Harry's closet.

 

 

 

Then again, there is always the tried and true explanation of leaked or stolen photos to create even more confusion about what's really going on here.  Conceivably, just more chaos to distract from that very loud, "I love you," from Harry. Along with the inevitable fandom speculation about who he will give that second statuette that was bestowed upon Brit recipients to give to someone else as "an act of kindness." 

 

A second award to give to someone worthy. "Maybe for a reason completely unrelated to music." Possibly someone who has his back.

On the other hand, given Louis Tomlinson's announcement that he is becoming an "independent" artist (yet to be seen), followed by Sony being removed from his website (the act obviously meant to convince the public that Louis' situation is changing) , there certainly could be other happenings associated with this newfound Sony nonsense. Maybe something like that ridiculous manufactured twitter trend last week about how Harry is *gasp* losing his English accent because he's around Olivia Wilde so much. That's right, although some outlier tweets began to be seen right after his speech, for the most part, 24-hours later, people suddenly "realized," that Harry's losing his English accent!🤯 *shakes head* Talk about gaslighting of epic proportions. The kind of strong arm collective push to convince the public to not believe their own ears. Rather believe all these tweets of seemingly panicked "fans" suddenly obsessed with the Americanization of Harry. 

Flashback to the Big Lie Trump recently claimed, exhorting the world to not believe their own eyes about those January 6 insurrectionists, insisting instead that these rioters were not violent at all. Seriously, don't you know those "patriots" were actually "hugging and kissing" the police. In other words, let's be real. Gaslighters, got to gaslight. It's simply what they do. And, liars got to lie. That's how we know Sony hasn't gone anywhere yet when it comes to Louis Tomlinson.

In fact, the insistence that Harry is losing his accent was even more absurd considering he is currently on location in London and Brighton, filming a very English gay love story, surrounded by fellow countrymen and women.   Then again, My Policeman, just might be part of the reason for all of this duplicity in the first place.

 

Of course, for those paying attention, Sony can't help but show their hand, the clear reason for their deception eagerly provided in the coordinated articles being circulated. Articles at the ready, to spoon-feed the public with the "right" answer. At least, the right heterosexual...Harry can't-be-with Louis Tomlinson...answer.

Maybe it’s because he’s dating Olivia Wilde, who directed Harry in the upcoming movie “Don’t Worry Darling,” filmed in America.

Ah yes, the ol' America-California-Los Angeles nexus. In other words, never forget that Harry is nowhere near his very English arch nemesis, Louis Tomlinson.

As the 'Golden' singer has said, he feels most at home in his house in London, but, he spends so much of his life on the road and recorded loads of his second album, 'Fine Line' out in California where so many of his friends live.

Remember, being an independent artist does not mean being a free one. Although we here at Narnia recognize progress when we see it and cannot deny that Louis' announcement is most definitely a step in the right direction.

 

May 11, 2021

 

So congratulations, Louis. And congratulations, Harry. Two very special men who keep walking that fine line and strategizing how to best climb those high walls and embrace the future together. You two are incredibly brave, and inspiring. The dream team in every way.

 

Pic sources: Harry Styles Fashion Archive, Twitter, Tumblr, Music Week, The Brits - ITV, The Grammys - CBS

Our Playlist: Drag Me Down - Louis Tomlinson (Live from London) 

                     Ultra Light Beam (Kanye West Cover, The Garage) - Harry Styles 

                     Can't You See - Marshall Tucker Band

                     Brilliant Disguise - Bruce Springsteen