Pandemic Panic and Profiteering off of Harry Styles' Closet...Again

Let's begin by cleansing our collective palates before we wade into the malodorous muck and money grubbing mendacity that was so abruptly thrust upon the Twitter world yesterday afternoon by Olivia Wilde. Without a doubt, the contrived "trending" sequence of events, was accompanied by carefully crafted spoonfed messages. Each posting designed for public consumption, stood in stark contrast to a devoted fandom reliving Sunday's effortless expression of spontaneity and shared contentment between two young men who simply found each other over a decade ago. Back then each one was merely pursuing their dreams while embracing love along the way. No ulterior motives. No shortcuts. No gimmicks.

 

What coming home actually looks like. 

Valentine's Day, Paris 2012            

 

 

 

Interviewer:  And, what kind of boyfriend is Louis Tomlinson?💙💚

"He's caring. He treats me really well."  ~Harry Styles

Now, that's some solid content. A real moment in time. Something that does not insult a sentient being's intelligence. Something that brings a smile to the face of any viewer who has ever experienced love. 

Fast forward to Monday afternoon, where one of the more despicable, shameless players in Hollywood gleefully ramped up a PR stunt to help sell a film. An individual arrogant enough to think that by wrapping herself in the invincibility cloak of faux "I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar" Sisterhood rants, she will somehow be protected from charges of hypocrisy and double-dealing. In fact, to ensure we don't forget, Olivia Wilde has spent practically all of 2021, grabbing headlines and the spotlight by selling a sham sexual relationship with her closeted male co-star; showing "private," ad  naseum moments and set footage of this same man, rather than her female co-stars. Wilde obviously having no problems with viral stories popping up on the usual suspects like Just Jared, PageSix, People, TMZ, HarpersBizarre, Cosmopolitan, et al. with slimy rumors about a nanny supposedly exposing how much she loves to "go down" on her "new love".  And then, on the last day of filming (or what PR teams want us to believe was the last day), she's suddenly all about the feminist message of her movie and creating a groundbreaking project by women, for women; a trailblazer all about supporting her gender. Sell your fake feminism somewhere else, sistah.

"Really?" you say. But, I thought she was a serious and respected woke artist. It's going to be a bumpy ride, but let's just take a stroll down memory lane, shall we? Refresh some memories about who Olivia Wilde actually is before she began to rehabilitate her image with a seven-year engagement (LOL!) to Jason Sudeikis, and began to curate a prim and proper motherhood/businesswoman persona. We'll give you the abridged version to save time.

Filing for divorce from Tao Ruspoli after eight years of marriage (or, at least that's the official narrative the public has been sold) in March 2011, Olivia Wilde's career advancement was all about selling relationships with actors, surrounded by gay rumors. Just like today, the tabloid fodder was hardly subtle and comically serial in nature. "Relationships" coyly provocative, but met to boost her het cred by capitalizing on the Hollywood closet. Sound familiar?

March 2011

New Couple Alert: Ryan Gosling and Olivia Wilde?

After separating from her husband has the House star moved on?

By Ted Casablanca, Taryn Ryder Mar 01, 2011

 

Inside Olivia Wilde’s Secret Date With Ryan Gosling!

By Us Weekly Staff

 

Bradley Cooper, Olivia Wilde “Definitely Hooking Up”

By Us Weekly Staff

June 2, 2011

 

Jake Gyllenhaal & Olivia Wilde Get Flirty in L.A.

By People Staff Updated June 28, 2011

 

Olivia Wilde dating Jake Gyllenhaal?

Jenna Gregory November 23, 2011 9:39 am

 

Whew! That got her through March - November 2011 when she finally decided to go the family route to advance her film career. Did we mention the interesting timing of how after hooking up with his new "partner," Jason Sudeikis left Saturday Night Live  (2012-13 season) to pursue his own film and television career.  Ah, the tangible benefits of a straight image.

New York, NY - Olivia Wilde and Jason Sudeikis took their cute baby Otis, along with the family pooch, for an afternoon stroll in NYC. Olivia and actor Jason, 38, have been together since November 2011 and got engaged in January 2013) AKM-GSI pic May 24, 2014

Hmm, AKM-GSI, the same photo agency that was involved with Louis Tomlinson's Babygate. What a coincidence. Remember this gem?

AKM-GSI eOnline

                                                                                          

And don't think that Olivia tapped down on the high profile hetero cred stuff just because she decided to stick with the Sudeikis stunt, ahem, relationship. Not a chance.

From one of our favorite, "I've got a vagina and know how to use it repeatedly" articles.

  Oct. 9, 2012

Olivia Wilde Said a Great Many Things About Her Vagina Last Night - Vulture

And because this article is so illustrative of Wilde's desperate approach to her career, we think it deserves a bit more detail. Pull up a chair and stay awhile,

• "Olivia Wilde told the audience, which included her boyfriend, Jason Sudeikis, about the end of her first marriage. “I felt like my vagina died,” she said. “Turned off. Lights out …" 
  

• "What followed her divorce was a man-eating sex bender that ultimately left her feeling so lonely she considered “a soft kind of lesbian relationship, just gentle kissing and scissoring.”

• That is, until she met someone — hi, Jason! —and fell “blissfully, hopefully, wildly in love.” Wilde said she was happy in her new relationship, except for the nagging worry that the hot monogamy (“We have sex like Kenyan marathon runners”)  might not last.

In Olivia Land, relationships can legally only last seven years, without an option to renew.... In Olivia Land, all the kids go to boarding school at seven. It’s like in Harry Potter!     

 

Alrighty then. Sounds like a loving partner and mother, don't you think? And please don't make the mistake in believing that she is the only one taking advantage of Harry's closet. Remember this pic from the Don't Worry Darling set with Florence Pugh? The one with the actress' back strategically turned to the camera to properly capture the logo?

 

Azoff Sugar High

 

 

Hmm. Apple Pan. Apple Pan. Now where has Narnia seen that name before?

 

EATER, Los Angeles

Oh, that's right. Shelli and Irving Azoff bought that restaurant back in February 2019. Guess the pandemic must have "eaten" into their multi-million dollar assets a bit, and they needed some free advertisement to market curbside services *wink*🍔. How sad. Looks like it certainly pays to have a son who exploits manages Harry Styles.

 

By the way did we also mention the contract Olivia signed with New Line, which included a lucrative backend deal in need of a devoted female fandom to prey upon? Enter Harry Styles. A ready made cash cow she could tap into to supply a guaranteed interest with a massive audience more than willing to open up their pocketbooks to support Harry in everything he does. Become his fake "one and only" and the odds of succeeding are advanced exponentially. Predatory capitalism at its finest.

 

Sources say that the filmmakers and producers stand to get 50 percent in the profit participation, which kicks in when the film breaks even. The Hollywood Reporter, August 12, 2019.

 

In closing, a few more observations about why this unbelievably heavy-handed and embarrassing stunt should have been expected given the way in which both he and Louis invariably seem to always be running "from the bullets" when it comes to the institutionalized impositions of the closet. Back on September 11, 2020, when Harry was first announced to have a role in, Don't Worry Darling, Narnia was apprehensive primarily because of the involvement of Olivia Wilde and knowing, much like Taylor Swift, how much she enjoys the added agency and fringe benefits she receives by aligning herself with closeted performers.  But, just a week later, when the following teaser was revealed for yet another film, Harry's fate was all but sealed. In other words, this "relationship" serves a career and monetary purpose for Wilde while coinciding with Sony's rock n' roll, Harry dates women, but only seeks emotionally unattached, one-night-stand-pleasure with men, for physical gratification. What a cool guy, right?

 

So yes. Harry will be allowed to do a queer love story. But, no way will his team tolerate any ambiguous, "Is he, or isn't he?" chatter going on behind the scenes while filming. Much better to have mean-spirited allegations like this one surrounding his attachment to the project.

Brilliant, Jeff. Let's separate Harry from his community even further.

 

Moreover, in November when Harry was nominated for his first Grammy Awards for his outstanding work on "Fine Line," the double whammy of needing to be portrayed as straight and as edgy as possible if he wanted to be competitive as a Grammy-nominated artist looms even larger. The "dirty boy" image being elevated, once again, the one that Simon Cowell began to forge as early as December 2010 when a 16 year-old Harry was "accidentally" caught on mic whispering into Matt Cardle's ear about how he now was assured of getting lots of p*ssy after the solo singer finished in First Place on the X-Factor Finale. Surely, an unscripted moment with no hidden agenda. *sarcasm intended*

 

In short, from the very beginning of his show business career, Harry Styles™ was always about over the top womanizing stunts. Never mind the obvious fact that he can't be seen working in England on the same soil as Louis William Tomlinson without him being publicly "known" to be in a high profile hetero relationship (hence the ridiculous moving in together, with Wilde, and even wanting to have kids rumors). No doubt, she'll be following him overseas to London. Right, Sony?

 

Who knows? Perhaps this may even help to explain why Harry did not even thank the Recording Academy, or his fans, for his nominations. For someone as grateful and gracious as Harry, his silence on the matter indeed spoke volumes. Even in the 21st century, The Closet (albeit with a more complex, and layered approach) is still "The Sign of The Times". And until the industry and audiences stop supporting and reflexively reinforcing this kind of oppression, nothing will change for those performers/artists who truly want to be free and continue to communicate that desire and pride in a thousand different ways.

Detail from Louis Tomlinson's music video, "Miss You"

                                   

                              

 

 

 

 

Ahhhh. Much better.

 

 

Our pic sources: eOnline; Tumblr; Twitter; Instagram; Collider; Music Video - "Miss You"; AKM-GSI