Sunday, January 30, 2022

From the Bleacher Seats: An Idea Box Running Low on Stock and Flying the Hi-Profile Skies

 Picture yourself.

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

riding the teacups,

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Enjoying a picnic in the park,

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sitting outside on the bleachers, in the warm weather, watching a softball game, Hey batter batter batter...

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aaaaah, forget about the toe-freezing cold outside and mentally take yourself to a warm memory for a few minutes.  It'll be a great escape!

And then come back to earth, lol.   It doesn't mean we can't remember, relive or hope for a return to some of the great moments.  But we just don't want to let our guard down so that we are lulled into a dreamy state where we get blindsided or disemboweled by an intended gut punch.  The likes of Sony Music, a Simon Cowell, WME/Endeavor talent agency, and certain publicists/marketing teams are always at work behind the scenes, trying to rid their clients of pesky fans who know the truth. Those who dare to challenge the trappings of TPTB. Those fans who fight back against the lies and know who the real couples are.

Once this simple truth is realized, then it becomes all too clear why fans are being trolled and doxxed. Why they become the target of anonymous abuse. This makes it easier to steel oneself against predictable onslaughts of attacks.  

Learn to recognize the patterns in key word usage and accusations in pr intern comments/replies/Anon Asks because there are commonly used bullet points/check marks in most fandoms.  Acknowledge that these accounts do exist and in large numbers, on social media.  Very large numbers. Social media managers know how to use these accounts to apply techniques found in group psychology on how to manipulate, gaslight, create group polarization, and bandwagon to name just a few.

And lastly, remember that we control our social media.  We decide who we follow, who we talk to, who has access.  We can mute or block at will.  Pffft!  Be gone!  This helps to prevent fight-or-flight, meltdowns or a very hostile publicist slipping into your DM's, as happened to civilian fan Decoding Anna of the Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles fandom (and can be read about in our four-part series on Decoding Anna). 

Unfortunately, this is why Narnia Dispatches has to approve commenters. We also had to close our Mail Inbox several years ago.  While Jake Gyllenhaal's fandom isn't near as large as One Direction's or even Supernatural's, he has WME/Endeavor, Sony Films, and a homophobic publicist team behind him.  They harass and stalk those who dare to challenge crafted narratives.  They became and still can, take on the persona of friendly fire on social media, only to turn into a fox in the chicken coop.    While social interaction with others is missed, in the long run, for this particular blog, it just is not possible and we've been able to avoid the headaches of social media harassment.

With this in mind, there have been a few observances we just wanted to touch upon and comment.


• This is a live look at Jake Gyllenhaal publicist, Mara Buxbaum, who every January and February, uses her team to dig up ideas for distractions. The goal is to hide Jake's public disappearance by making it seem like he is doing things, particularly things that point to him being straight or that dispel any lingering whispers about a certain blind vice.












Not quite sure what it will be like when Jake and Austin reach 50 and 60, lol.  Maybe the publicity folks will need to consult with Nicholas Cage or Jeff Bezo's team.  What Jake's people have come up with so far in 2022 is this:

- Let's have Jake pose in the color red for W Magazine to try and "prove" that he and Tay "dated".  Pose with a vacuum cleaner and try to pretend he's vacuuming a red scarf, etc. etc.  Must have been a three-pot of coffee brainstorm meeting that day for Mara's team.

 








See?  Red shirt, song is called "Red".  He has on heart glasses, she's got on heart glasses, get it?  Huzzah! There must have been something there. 😉 Just in case someone needed help.


*sigh*








• Let's have meard Tom Holland dress like Jake in his fairly recent No Way Home promo appearances so that purposeful twitter account Deva Art can use the material to push the bro - oh excuse me, the "romance".  😉  Anyone but Austin Nichols after all.




Looks more like Management took a page from Tumblr blogs and tried too hard to force this story line.   #embarrassing

 

- And then besides being a barrel scraper, there have been two separate blind items dropped on social media.  This particular one garnered only three (3) replies on Datalounge:




Nor is there even a source referenced, smh.   Then there's this erotic fan fiction, I mean Paul Bunyan-sized "blind" on a site called "The Medium".  We're not posting it - again, we have standards for this space.  If you'd like to read though, not to worry - the "blind" is called The Movie Star and Me.



 

The blind paints Jake as a backstage predator of young female interns while he was performing on Broadway. 




Riiiight, I mean...  Again, embarrassing. 

The fan fic "blind" is more appropriate for A03.   Meanwhile, Jake's team continues to brainstorm for additional ideas to cover for his winter holiday time with the fam...








 

 

 

🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪🎪


 

And Austin?  Austin is traveling around with Otis, the family dog.  Alone.  Like Robinson Crusoe.

 

He be road trippin'


 

Allegedly snow skiing with the bro-in-law and nephew (perhaps it's a case of "not pictured" are the Gyllynichols ski team??):

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And wishing he had been able to carry some of the little Gyllynichols tots back in the day.


Love Austin in glasses!!

 

Now THAT's a cute pic.  😍



🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐🚐


• Now, let's pivot to a live look at Sony Music, who has been throwing every kind of nasty punch against the wall lately with One Direction.  









 

The nasty, desperate punches include making Liam Payne continue to promote other artists for his next Veeps show, which was to be held January 29th, but has now been postponed to February 14 (Gee, Valentine's Day - that's not ominous now, is it?).  Supposedly, Liam has COVID.  (Even though on January 25, he tweeted about having a new twitter account devoted to chatter about NFT's!)  How curious that Billboard did not announce the original show set for January 29, but somehow amplifies the Valentine's Day rescheduled program. Almost like they knew the first show wasn't going to happen anyway so why bother to promote it.



Just in case anyone questions that Liam has COVID he's made to do a Livestream in bed yesterday to show just how listless and stuffy he is.  Seems like overkill, but we wouldn't want people to become suspicious about the whole last minute Valentine's Day reschedule, do we? In fact, while he's at it, let's also have Liam explain at length why this show is being reformatted too. That way Liam is made to take responsibility, if anything hinky happens.  

"Usually, my shows in the past have had a theme...we had a Halloween show where I got to be Jack Sparrow...we always did them on a certain day....And, the closest day coming up...is Valentine's Day. Now, the show is not actually going to be on Valentine's Day. It's going to be on the 12th of Feb...but we're going to make it a whole romance "Here's to the Future" type deal....Maybe I can be some type of One Direction matchmaker person."  Just a little fact check by the way. All his shows have not had a connection with a holiday theme.

Okaaaay, Liam. We get it. This whole change to a romantic theme at the last minute isn't odd at all. It's not like you didn't know that Valentine's Day was happening on February 14 when you originally announced the show on January 8.

Anyhow, back to Liam's show and its angle of once again, promoting other artists' music instead of his own.


"Liam Payne will be showcasing new and emerging acts on his latest Veeps show with performances from artists around the world.  Liam will be playing a short set and hosting this incredible night of performances."

 

Like in July of last year the show is called "Here's to the Future".  But, once again, the emphasis is on other artists. Not Liam Payne which continues to make the title some kind of self-mockery. Good to know that Liam apparently doesn't have a future in music to celebrate.  At least not yet anyway. Funny how similar this is to his bandmate Louis Tomlinson who has been posting about having Faith in the Future, without any visible signs of true progress with his musical career either.

No, instead of Liam using his vast fandom to elevate his profile we get, "Liam will be playing a short set."

C'mon, people, what performer who is trying to build a solo career for himself, does this?  The show uses his name and extraordinary social media following for a Liam Payne show on Veeps.  But hey, he's hardly performing.  Instead the Liam Payne show is there to lift up other artists, not promote his own music. Let's go ahead and call it "Here's to the Future".   Trying to get people to think that all this makes sense, he even goes so far as to announce on his 1/29 Livestream that these four people are his "favorite acts" at the moment. Uh-huh.

As if this whole situation isn't suspicious enough, of these four individuals, Narnia has to make particular note of  Madilyn Bailey. Let's see, who might she have a direct career connection with? That's right. Of all the performers Liam is forced to help with THEIR future because all of a sudden he's so into them, is someone who made it to the semifinals of America's Got Talent just four months ago. And who is the Executive Producer and judge on AGT?  Well, none other than Simon Cowell.  Remember that guy who continues to try to get people to believe he has receded into the background so no one thinks HIS fingerprints are all over the continued sabotaging of One Direction members; especially, Louis and Liam. Someone who recently indicated that he was retiring. Yeah, right. An announcement he conveniently shared with his favorite sabotage rag, The Sun. Remember, there's a reason, One Direction is officially still on hiatus six years later. That way Simon Cowell can continue his subversive ways behind the curtain to carry out his personal vendettas against the guys. And, don't think for a moment that Sony is not right there with him.

So on January 21, someone tweeted from Louis' twitter account with an OTT gushing reference to Freddie Reign's alleged birthday, thinking they would throw another gut punch to the fandom, following Louis' birthday and Christmas nonsense from December.  Think about it. Freddie Reign is six-years old and doesn't even have a twitter account so who in the heck was that tweet for?  Think about it. But, instead of simply playing the victims of management manipulation, many Larrie fans were mentally prepared for the shenanigans and in an epic counter move, turned the tables on the tweet and began referencing Freddie Mercury, a beloved hero of Louis's.  They found all kinds of creative ways to tweet about the rock and roll icon until he began to trend.

 




It seemed to antagonize some other folks. 

 


 




 

 

 

 

Aaah yes, the ol' "seek help" line.  Aw, you hate to see that kind of straw grasping.

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And "middle-aged"?   That was a reach, smh.  

But the counter strategy by Louis' fans was Grade A+.  💯

 

📆📆📆📆📆📆📆📆📆📆📆📆

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now, let's fast-forward to the first Side Eye Award of 2022 which will go to the narrative that Kansas City Chiefs' tight end Travis Kelce and his brother, Philadelphia Eagles' center Jason Kelce would have their mother, Donna Kelce fly commercial on Sunday, Jan 16, in order to catch both of their NFL Wild Card games taking place on the same day.  Jason's team was playing the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in an early regular season game.  Travis' team was playing the Pittsburgh Steelers later that evening.  

Most Chiefs fan by this time know that one of Patrick Mahomes' sponsor partnerships is with Airshare, a private jet company.  Patrick has used their services to transport his family to away games and, no doubt, other opportunities and outings for teammates as well.  With flying commercial being an undesirable option for travel right now due to COVID, one might think the mother of close teammate Travis could benefit by way of more private accommodations instead of stressing over flight times, making any gate transfers delays, catching Ubers, going through security and racing to make it to Arrowhead.  

Instead, the brothers played ball while Mother Kelce was on her own, her adventurous trek from game to game documented the entire day with play-by-play tweets.  From beginning to end.  

They took a photo at Raymond James Stadium (there was no denying because the stadium scoreboard was in the background, you see).   Then, here she was riding a rickshaw after the first game was done and she had to get to the airport:

 


 












On the plane on the way to K.C.!


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then, once in Kansas City, the ride to Arrowhead Stadium!

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I mean, who fed these photos to the NFL, who is shown with the photo credit?  Was it Mrs. Kelce?  Who tipped the NFL that she was going to undertake this trip?  Or was it prompted by the NFL themselves as an idea for a human interest story? They could have also done a similar story for Connie Watt, who has three sons playing in the NFL. Sons T.J. and Derek both play for the Pittsburgh Steelers, a team the Chiefs eliminated in the Wild Card round.  Son J.J. Watt plays for the Arizona Cardinals, a team also eliminated in a Wild Card game. 

  In this article from a site called Pop Creep, look at their wording in this sentence:

 


 

"required to attend".  Huh, well that's kind of interesting wording, isn't it?  I would've thought one would write "wanted to attend" because it involved both sons and would've  been totally understandable. 

We had photos all day long, documenting the journey.  Big twitter accounts providing the updates.  And then Mama Kelce crashing the post-game presser (of a play-off game, no less), being the first to be able to ask Travis some questions. And THAT moment gets fed to social media. 

Then the story makes all of the major sports networks, ESPN, NFL Network, Sports Illustrated, CNN, USA Today, etc.  

Amazing...an awful lot of fanfare over albeit a nice story, but all of the play-by-play?  Major network coverage?  All because the adventure took place by flying commercial.

Methinks that was an awful lot of OTT, aka over-the-top.  And that photo allegedly on the plane?  Easily manip'd.  Ballcaps and masks can be manip'd onto faces.  Very easy to copy/paste her in front of a plane seat.  Does it seem like this is creating a mountain out of a molehill?

How about when you find a little nugg-ito like this one in Sports Illustrated from last September '20, which catches the eye:

 

Jason spent his offseason in Philadelphia, training at team headquarters, and with his wife, Kylie, caring for their 10-month-old daughter, Wyatt. He speaks of the difficulties 2020 has posed to each undertaking. The Kelces’ mother, Donna, had to stay home in Orlando during the spring due to COVID-19, and when she visited Philly in the early summer months with Travis, who arranged a private flight, the family did what everyone else did: stayed in, ordered takeout, reminisced about normalcy. - source

 

Well, well, well.  Just think - this time around, we were dealing with the much more highly contagious Omicron variant of COVID.  This is why these kinds of high profile, excessive productions tend to catch Narnia's eye, if you know what we mean.  They're usually hiding something.  😉😊

 

🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now, let's ask a few questions we at Narnia are wondering about:

 

a)  Whatever happened to Jared's "bar brawl/assault" hearing???  👀👀

b)   Boy, once the season started, whatever happened to all of the mob attacking of Chicago Blackhawks' Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane?  Social media chatter returned to hockey, didn't it?  👀👀

c)  Funny how Liam Payne is supposed to be down with COVID (even going so far as to be seen sniffling in bed), yet he's still quite active doing Live's, on Discord, Twitter, and talking about NFT's. 


 

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀


We don't need to stop, pause and wonder about the low-grade quality of these photos that recently appeared of Niall Horan and his alleged girlfriend, Amelia Wooley.  They are a royal mess and the editing gaffs are too numerous to point a laser beam on.


Photo 1:  Make note of the man's head directly behind Niall, the Tiny Foot which is supposed to be Wooley's, but looks more like a child's, and the improbability of what is supposed to be Niall's leg right beneath the Tiny Foot. How can that be Niall's knee when you look at the proximity to where his bicep is? What is this a double-jointed, contortionist  version of Twister?





 

 

 

 

 

 

Photo 2:  Note the man's head is still right behind Niall's shoulder (we assume that is...his arm? lol)  Note where Wooley's mouth and profile are in relation to the top of the hair (which Niall's hand is, we assume, cradling?).  smh.

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Photo 3:  Note absence of man's head behind Niall.  Note the brown pole in this photo, but it's not in the other two photos.  The size of the blonde woman in taupe is very off scale in proportion to the brunette in the white hat.

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Niall's face has been manip'd onto another body.  You can see the line of the merging of two heads particularly in Photo's 1 and 2.  Behind Niall's ear.  Those are two different heads merged together (and two different shades of hair).

 


 

Now, the photo shopping is so obvious and so badly executed in these photos, one can only ask why?    

 

📷📷📷📷📷📷📷📷📷📷📷📷 

 

Still more topics to cover, but time is of the essence and we don't need our topics to be totally outdated.  LOL!   We'll see what happens at Spn-Dallas today and what #15's sidecars do as well, depending on a win or loss.

We are also looking forward to Louis's tour, which starts on February 1 in Dallas, along with everyone else and meanwhile, try to stay warm!

 

Patrick and Jonny

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

J2 Date Night Chicon 2014

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tom Holland and Harrison Osterfield

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

vintage Adam Lambert and Kris Allen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have a GREAT Sunday!!   And REMEMBER...




 

collaboration:  Prairie Girl and Methodical Muser

pic sources:  gifer,  fyeahkradam, tenor, pinterest, tumblr, popcreep, giphy, gfycat

our playlist:  Jazz Man - Carole King

                     Leaving on a Jet Plane - Frank Sinatra

                     Let's Fly Away - Voyage

                     Inside Out (Live - 1990) - Phil Collins


 

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