Sunday, March 10, 2019

Sunday Musings: Loofahs, Muck and an OTP Shout-Out in Slo-Mo















 

• Once in a great while, there comes a shoddy headline or unsavory story where it feels like there aren't enough shower heads or loofah sponges within reach to scrub off the lingering "effects" of the muck left behind.  The following tweet, and accompanying picture, best encapsulates what one such slimy moment looked like this past Friday.


The first indication of what was about to come should have been detected straight away based on that attached palsy-walsy image, but it was actually the first eleven words which soiled the message at the outset and signaled the chaotic rubbish which was about to be flung into the universe.

 "LISTEN NOW @Louis_Tomlinson is one of the most honest people"

 First of all, Fig Wootton's application of the All Caps format with, "LISTEN NOW," set the stage for what was about to come.  Obviously, this attention grabber was not only meant to convey authority, but since megaphones aren't allowed on twitter, the world-wide amplification of the message was understood.  Of course he also makes sure to use one of Louis' most appealing and well-known traits against him, as a sales pitch for his own benefit.  In other words, because "you all" value his honesty so much, listen to my podcast to hear Louis not lie.  Don't believe anything that you already know to be a verifiable fact, or actually have seen with your own eyes, because you're finally going to get the gospel according to Louis. 

"he's laying it all out"
"He opens up"

 #TwoOfUs -  to grab that currently engaged audience.

 "1D reunion" - also a sales pitch lure

 #XFactor - plug

 Then there's that picture.  The grubby hands, Simon Cowell-esque don't-move-remember-your-place-as-a-powerless-man-and-don't-you-forget-it.  The physical contact is also supposed to make folks think these two guys must be the best of friends. Otherwise, Louis surely wouldn't let someone like that interview him and allow lies to be published about him, would he?  Of course not! Louis is an honest man, remember? Pffft.

 But, let's look a bit closer at that body language between Louis and Fig Wootton. That arm around the shoulder is most definitely a power move.  Situations can be different, but looking at the history of Wootton and his "professional" "collaborative" relationship to Simon Cowell and Simon Jones (Louis' PR in name only since he literally does nothing positive for him), well, let's just say there's solid reason not to see any friendly gesture going on here. More like a real "captive" moment if you will. And because Wootton and Jones are openly gay, surely Syco and it's tagalong tabloid mouthpiece must be supportive of Louis and his career, right?

Dave Straker, M.Sc. Psychology. Author of changingminds.org.

Jun 15, 2017 · Author has 814 answers and 934.9k answer views



Touch is highly dependent on both situation and culture.

Cultures always have rules about touching. Some are more liberal and others very ‘no touch’. Variables include pressure and where to touch, with rules about gender, age and seniority.

In general, touch implies one of two things: friendship or threat. For me to let another person touch me, I must first trust them and secondly understand their intent.

Men often use touch as a power signal, with threat cloaked in friendship. Touching other men as well as women, particularly in the workplace, says ‘I can break social rules because I am powerful’. Done with a smile and gentle touch on arm or shoulder it seems friendly, but the situation will tell more about what it could mean.

 - Is putting your hands on someone's shoulders a sign of affection?

Simon Cowell has made that dominant move on many occasions:




Then there's Louis and Rob Stringer at a post-Grammy's party, Feb 2016:


The ol' one-two (Stringer on one side, Cowell on the other):
http://28nachos.tumblr.com/post/177282645407/imlouistomlinson-la-2208
Fig Wootton's podcast, which was really nothing more than a retread-of-old-topics, strategically landed on Friday, March 8, just as Louis' new single "Two of Us" had been climbing up the charts globally, and had become available for download on iTunes the day before.  Nothing new, just rehashes of rehashed old topics:  Harry.  Larry. Conspiracy Theories. The Larrie Fandom. Zayn.  Reunion of 1D.  Eleanor.   Dan "Fig" Wootton is like Clark Griswold who can't get out of the roundabout and telling everyone "Look kids, Big Ben! Parliament!"

               

The goal (or should we say the agenda) is quite clear by now. Sabotage Louis' record launch by getting him to go on the record about topics that would alienate a large part of his loyal fandom. As always, think about why Cowell would want to do that and I think you will have your answer. The pattern is well-established by now. Devalue the 1D brand. Gaslight and factionalize fans (pit one group against the other). Attack Larries with conspiracy theories and hopefully, finally, after nearly nine years of trying (e.g., Bullshit 1.0; Bullshit 2.0; Freddie; the public separation of Louis and Harry; the peculiar return of Eleanor), convince everyone that Harry and Louis are not a couple, damn it! What was that quote by Elton John again? Oh, yeah.

“When a rumor doesn't go away, it's not a rumor.” 

Let's be clear. Nearly a decade later, Larry Stylinson no longer qualifies as a rumor. No matter how many times TPTB bully, gaslight, and/or stomp their feet. Louis and Harry are in love and in a committed relationship. They are family. No matter how hard you try to erase their worth or their status.


BREAKING NEWS!  Speaking of Simon Cowell's relentless campaign aimed at undermining Louis' career, guess who Louis just began to follow on Instagram? An artist by the name of Sam Martin who just happens to have a single out called, "Sabotage," - released on January 18, 2019. Looks like SBB is alive and kicking and we love him for it. We here at Narnia have immense respect for you, Mr. Tomlinson. Keep up the fight and so shall we. #We'veGotYourBack



To sum up, this Fig Wootton episode from March 8 is really another reminder that despite successful solo releases, tours and public appearances, during this Hiatus from Hell, none of the 1D men (including Zayn) are truly free (with the curious public exception of Niall Horan who seems to have much more perceived autonomy).  And it's more than obvious that Louis, Liam, and Harry are not out from under the control of Syco, and they still have some form of contractual obligations and image rights shackles.  These balls & chains include, but are not limited to the following groping tentacles, otherwise known as Cheryl Cole, Piers Morgan, Dan "Fig" Wootton, Capital FM, Simon Cowell, Gigi Hadid, Eleanor, Freddie Reign, Bear Payne, the Azoffs, the Clarks and B. Jungworth, etc. Well you get the point.  It's not over until it's over. One has to wonder by now what the real reason behind this so-call hiatus was. And, let's just say that it most definitely was not about rest or personal ambition on the part of 1D. No, what's become obvious after three years of this Groundhog Day time loop is how Sony/Syco is completely obsessed with getting rid of the Larrie fandom. And, that they have identified Louis as the vehicle to best accomplish their homophobic goal. In their warped minds they can kill two birds with one stone. Remember, if they succeed, Louis' career will fail. A win-win for Sony/Syco who have always identified Louis as the main threat to their power. The trick for all of us who support 1D and Louis and Harry, is to outlast TPTB. Because contracts do eventually end. And good guys can beat the odds.
• And speaking of tentacles, someone has had them reaching for and latching onto Liam for several weeks now.  Between associating him with notorious beard Naomi Campbell, "old flame" Cheryl Tweedy Fernandez-Versini Cole, and even standing within handshake distance of another 1D beard, Bella Hadid, Liam is being run ragged lately. In the Fig Wootten interview, Louis had to even note that he had not seen him in months. Funny how Cowell couldn't wait to sell the friendship for his inane X-Factor Judges House show last Fall. But, now we are to think that they don't even stay in touch much. No doubt because Liam is so busy chasing a near quinquagenarian. You would have thought that, at 25, Liam would have caught her by now. LOLLLLL! That is if he was really interested, which we so know he's not.

Here's a desperate example of pushing a fauxmance when you have nothing:

Stand in front of an apartment building:




A rag headline spotting:


 
Play the "elusive" game so that you don't have to go on the record:



Attend the "SAME!" events:



Create a fake "cheating" scandal against fake beau:
And then while one is at it, let's use Liam's twitter account to get him involved in a nasty online "argument" with Piers Morgan:



This comes after another account takeover to ridicule and disrespect 1D fans in response to a suspicious account's accusatory tweet:
In other words, it's been Open Hunting Season on Liam Payne. More so than usual, let us phrase it that way.  It has been difficult to watch; Narnia cannot imagine what it must be like to actually live it.  

                                                                                             courtesy of deviantart 


• Back on October 20 last year 2018, Austin posted on his Instagram about a film "Free Solo", which he was very much inspired by:


 
Here's a different shot:


Notice Jimmy Chin's words of thanks on Austin's post.

And then Jake posted about the same film on his Facebook, one day later on October 21.  


Jimmy Chin posted his thanks to Jake as well:

 

And then, in a move that we at Narnia blew off because the photos involved yet another "screening" [go 'head, go 'head chastise us, we deserve it!], Jake pulled a little hubby shoutout in that subtle way that he can:


 
Here's a link to the Just Jared post:  Jake hosting screening for Free Solo 

Jake's screening publicity focused on the climber and the directors.  But in the below Zimbio picture, is someone second from the right who is also affiliated with the film.  This screening occurred on January 9, in support of the film's Oscar nomination for Best Documentary.  The man second from the right is Evan Hayes, who is a producer with Free Solo.  He also was an executive producer for Jake's film, Everest.


 Fast forward to this past Thursday, Mar 7 and Austin tweeted the following.  Here's Austin with a rather firm grip on the joystick, I mean Oscar statuette.  ;-)

Not only tweeted, but he posted on Instagram and dropped a mention that Evan Hayes used to be a college roommate of his back in his USC days.  


 

 Boy, when these two 38 year old ornery-kins do their shoutouts to each other, don't you feel like you just walked a marathon following along with the clues?


I mean, that covered several months, several websites, different names....it really was the Encyclopedia Britannica edition.  LOL!

Awwww, but we won't complain.  We have the patience, we can do this!  And it's JAKE & AUSTIN!!!  We'll walk across any desert for a thirst quenching when it involves those two. 

• And to round out our Sunday Musings, here's some stupendous photos of Narnia's honorary member (because he is just such an exceptional button and quarterback), Mr. Patrick Mahomes!!  Here he was in a splendid black cherry suit at last night's 101 Banquet, held at the Kansas City Marriott Hotel downtown.

Look at this cutie!!!  What a charmer.


 


 

*beams*


 

Okay, okay, okay.  Better cool it or this author could go on forever!  lol.  M&M handles the more eloquent and intricate details, while I'm good for the slobbering part.  ;-)

As indicated in a previous comment on our last post, we were going to include an update on a story we've been following and has come to our attention again this past week, but because of further interesting findings, we feel that the topic deserves its own post.  So we'll look forward to bringing that to Narnia next time around.

Have a great Sunday and blown mwah's to all of our fave fellas on Narnia.



collaboration:  M&M and PG
pic sources:  Zimbio,  DeviantArt, imgflip, iwantmyname, Getty,
                    AceShowbiz, picswe, giphy
our playlist: Light Me Up - Bronze Radio Return
                    Can't Get Enough of Your Love - Barry White
                    Ain't Nothin' But a House Party - The Showstoppers


                      
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1 comment:

prairiegirl said...

That suit jacket of Patrick's was just the living end. He looked so wonderful last night. And he was smiling all around and just a real charmer in his video interview. Awwww. I love that Patrick.

We should have included that newly released video clip of Louis and Harry because that was really a story in itself and how it was released following that horror of an interview by Dan Fig Wootton. What a bullying tactic by that enabler. His behavior is downright scary. He's an enabler of the worst kind.

Sunday, March 10, 2019 at 1:13:00 PM CDT

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