Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Tuesday Musings: Two Strikes & You're Out with The Padackles Foursome


via GIPHY

Well, 

After a few weeks of quiet, Jake and Austin emerged with separate microburst online appearances....and then slipped back into the calm darkness.  Shhhhhhh...


 Here was Austin with his little dog Toto too, I mean the deard. 


 
Camo and curls, which sounds like a new drink, I think.  Austin shared the camo T-shirt once again (dated the 26th):

A few days prior to his Thanksgiving "alibi", we were privy to his rocking chair move again:



There's Austin, riding with a client from Rent-A-Yorkie in a video dated Nov 30 to remind us all that he is still in Texas and hanging with the beard. How do we arrive at this conclusion?  Because that is a Yorkie in his jacket, the beard owns a Yorkie (translation = Hassle must be in the vicinity! duh!), his motorcycle "obviously" has been moved back to Texas and therefore, this must translate to Austin in Texas, people.  #ComeOn  *wink*   As for the other video with the "rocking chair" move, who knows when that was taken.

Narnia was able to obtain access to a deleted-scenes reel left on the cutting room floor. We're grateful for this video preservation of what looks to have been the Exit-Stage-Right of another chunk of Austin's dignity....


R.I.P.

So on to the hubs.

Speed-Dial Caruso must have needed some private time, and Ryan Reynolds, Michael "Mike" Pena, Jay-Z, Denis Villenueve, Marcus Mumford, and Riz "little lobster" Ahmed must have told Jake they couldn't come out to play either because their absence in November was rather noticeable.  So for the first half of the month, this meant Jake's social media team felt like they needed to stain his timeline with old movie screen caps with former female co-stars and robot tweets/memes. If you tune into Jake's Instagram and twitter searches, there are plenty of old movie poses with Rachel McAdams, Anne Hathaway, Anna Kendrick and Gwyneth Paltrow to provide romantic feels.

In a rare deviance from this practice, here was an old/new green screen, I mean picture of Jake that cropped up on Nov 23.  From that alleged "weekender" to Dubai back in 2015, you know around the time of Baby Tile Congras' birth.  ;-)

We're not really sure of the original source of the above picture. Funny thing about Jake's social media feed - folks rarely credit the sources.  These pictures seem to pop out of the sky and right into laps.  It's amazing.  Although here was the obligatory empty-sidewalk New York City walkabout, supposedly taken Nov. 20.  No turkey or can of pumpkin in hand, Jakers?


and allegedly five days earlier at a Sotheby's auction (because of his Velvet Buzzsaw role).  This is categorized on I Heart Jake as a "fan photo".




Despite such a packed looking audience this day, how fortuitous for Jake that the seat next to him was vacant so he didn't have to place his jacket on the floor or around the back of his chair!  :-)  He must be living right!

 So what next for Jake's social media team? How to fill his dance card for the remainder of November? Never fear!  The increasingly ever-reliable.......Q & A.  The Q & A is the new Spin Cycle.  The new Going-To-The-Gym Walk. The new NYC train ride.  The new wedding guest appearance.  

So Jake, Carey Mulligan, Paul Dano, and his beard Zoe Kazan seemingly can't get enough of discussing their film, Wildlife.   Cue in New York City, Calvin Klein, Riva Marker, MoMA, the back of dark audience heads, backdrops, curtains, director chairs, and cucumber finger sandwiches.

Why not a luncheon?  Allegedly from the 28th, more Q & A discussion AND a light lunch!

And for a jovial moment, Narnia thought we would extend a shoutout to jakebullshittingovereverybody who created this flashback post.  See below as the "waving hand" emoji is trying to provide a "Snap out of it!" and pull Jake's eyes away from Zoe Kazan's exposed ankle:



 

 

Indeed! The ankle ogling is a 2018 throwback to the June 2010 Lakers A** Leer before he disappeared later that summer to prepare for the arrival of Baby Tile Leadville.  Remember this?



Fun times!  lol.  Now it's ankles (and for a sense of danger, the ankle belonging to the "wife" of his good friend, Paul Dano.  What a generous friend Dano is!)  Never change, Jake.  

 While Austin performed his obligatory pre-Thanksgiving GPS placement in Texas with the beard, he followed up on the 26th with several tweets/Instagrams which is a bit heavy-handed for him.  Jake wanted to place himself in New York City over the 27th and 28th of November.  So, from the 26th through the 28th, both Jake and Austin were hitting Jaustin fans from all directions.

From one side, we were pelted from Austin, who would only share with us pictures of himself with Yorkie dogs and Hassle "Chumley" Harrison. Bro-in-law Rowdy made an appearance through endorsing Instagram comments, but other than this, we have no mention of family members???  And as usual, no sign or mention of his father.  Austin always makes it very clear when he's headed to his hometown, but even at holiday time, it's not to be with family, but to ride his motorcycle and cuddle with diminutive dogs?

Interesting, isn't it?  In eight years of following Austin, this author can only recall having seen one picture of Austin with his father and that was from a 2015 photo which included all four family members.  We were told that his father and mother were in attendance at his Nostradamus 2015 premiere in New York City, but we never actually saw pictures of them; we saw his sister in a photo with the beard at that time - Chlo Bennet.  Aaah yes, remember this one!



When our neighbor next door posted an "anonymous" comment about Austin spending time in Texas this year for Thanksgiving, look at how it is phrased:

"Yes, with Austin's sister and her family."  Did Mr. Nichols Sr. move away from Texas?  To Michigan?  And so this was the light bulb moment when we here at Narnia began to realize that we never see Austin with his father.  Much like the rare sighting of Jake and his father together.  Remember this picture?

Who would have ever known that was even Stephen Gyllenhaal if it weren't for the tweeter providing the identification.  And who is this tweeter and why were they so emphatic about Jake dining "with his dad"?  Well, look at what is supposed to be the date the picture was taken.  December 11 of last year, 2017. It's interesting that this "fortunate and rare sighting" of father and son came in a month that Narnia believes was blessed with another Baby Tile stork arrival.

We also don't see Austin ever tweet or Instagram a shout-out to his father on Father's Day.  Now, Rowdy Stovall (Austin's trusty bro-in-law) has certainly had exclusive access to the Nichols patriarch's image on Instagram, hasn't he? Particularly during that time in February 2017 when the Nichols patriarch was Instagram'ed to be in such a serious state of health that he had a Caring Bridge page. And there were plenty of pictures of the bro-in-law, the sister, the nieces and the patriarch, remember that? They were on Rowdy's Instagram page. There just weren't any pictures of Austin.  Hmmmm....

And from the other side, we were pelted from Mr. Jake, who is still in the active process of spending as much time Q & A'ing, discussing, conversing, exchanging, and luncheon'ing with Wildlife as he did for Stronger, which coincidentally occurred at the same time as last year.  What a generous guy because Wildlife is promoted as Carey Mulligan's movie and earned her an Independent Spirit award nomination for female lead.  And considering that domestic box office sales for the movie recently stood at $933,465 and foreign sales at $507,069 for a total BO of $1,440,534; truly Jake is overextending as he stands by his good friends.  Even though mysteriously, he was absent for its promotion at the Cannes and Toronto Film festivals this year.  

 via GIPHY


Nonetheless, now both men have slipped back into the cornfields.  For now.  No doubt, they are observing Hanukkah, then there will be plenty of gifts to be purchased, stockings to stuff, bicycles and doll houses to put together, and another Baby Tile birthday party or two to celebrate.




And no, Austin, sorry! Your sneak-peek Month of August photo from the Austin Nichols 2019 Calendar present for the hubs does NOT count!  Cheers, fellas!  ;-)


 


*******************

And then there was Jensen and Jared who were the main honorees of a 300th Episode celebration; no doubt an important career goal and television footprint for both men.  And since this involved Supernatural, its cast of characters, and Jared + Jensen, well, the event could not unfold without drama, mearding, bearding and pr team adjustments.

There were a fair amount of photos released, beginning with this one which was one of the first of the celebratory festivities.

There were plenty of photos of Jensen, but Jared photos were harder to come by.  When the fandom did receive a photo of Jensen and Jared in the same photo, was it any surprise that they were separated by both beards and the meard, who was clearly enjoying his role as the OTP moat.

Some good old fashioned mearding and pandering:
http://some-people-call-it-tragic.tumblr.com/post/180683240551


Look at who is in the forefront of this TV Guide feature and who is in the background:


https://thetiredstuff.tumblr.com/post/180696541912/supernatural-cast-plays-who-said-it-jared
 

Using the beard to endorse the mearding:


https://teamfreewill-girl.tumblr.com/post/180693545256/because-everybody-needs-to-know-how-much-danneel
 

Well, there was this photo "appetizer",


 

 When the separation became so noticeable and undeniable, then and only then did Management release withheld photos to appease the J2 fans.


 


 

 

But the intent had already been revealed by the long delay.  Sorry, Mgmnt, but that would be called a, uh...well, a screw up on your part.


Why is this?  Because there's only two reasons to withhold OTP photos from a landmark event of a show which they are the original stars of, and neither one is a good one.  1) you're playing your audience.  In other words, you're getting believers stressed out and upset by separating Jared and Jensen, the two stars of the 300-episode series.    This would be called gaslighting.   2)  The pictures were purposely withheld and never intended to be released, that is until there was a fan outcry about how noticeable the omission was.  This would be called a PR Team screw-up.

 I mean.....LOL.  Take your pick.

 And to top off J2's week that was.  How about some additional OTT bearding and narrative feeding?  Here's Jensen and Danneel brick and mortar sealing the "We live in Austin, TX with each other and our children" narrative yet once more.  This video is a real trip.

Lots of what are supposed to be deal-sealing pictures:
 
 Let's blow one of those up.


Aaaah yes.  And since the camera was rolling, Management thought they would add some "helpful" het props:


 

This author is wondering if Jensen's people made a call to Jake's people???  Who remembers this golden moment?


 

Jensen taking a page out of Jake's playbook.  When in reality, maybe it's actually Danneel's book?  ;-)

In the meantime, after the Cockles pandering and heavy handed bearding, if we could still just have a live peek at Jensen's integrity for a moment....

Not a surprise to Narnia Dispatches as we've seen this kind of OTT, no-going-back gavel-throwing before, haven't we?  These are the kinds of pictures a closeted OTP half does for what they believe is going to be for the good of their real family unit for years to come.  They're preparing to go underground and it is a slow rollout, but this is yet another brick in that wall Jared and Jensen are building.  

 Try to point out what is actually going on or express disappointment and you will receive reactions like these on Spn Goss:


"I just want to not waste time being negative about how they should be doing this or that and enjoy them and the show while I can. I'm already sad about it ending soon anyway, tbh. Do I need to worry about Jensen not posting pictures of Jared? Nah, Jensen's got him no matter how many pictures he posts. Whatever."    11-18-2018


"Alright. Enjoy flicking the doom and gloom bean again. Y'all obviously only want to trash the Js 'cause they're not showing you shit anymore. I'll continue getting my gossip. Have a nice day.

PS: even though you say you're not making it about the Js, you are and it's shitty. I wouldn't dance for you either, when is the last time everyone was appreciative here? Except me and a few others last night? And getting irritated 'cause they're not acting like you want them to is the height of entitled fan..."  11-18-2018
 

Because it's always the fans' fault, isn't that what is being said?  Hey, it's all in how you (the fan) react to what's being peddled on social media. Ignore the bearding.  Ignore the mearding. Ignore the separation.  Ignore the disrespect and the lies.  Just know deep inside your OTP-loving female heart that your beloved Jared & Jensen are still together! They're together and they "have each other's backs" and Jensen is wiping Jared's nose, Jared is being his fragile better half just like these two have always been doing.  It doesn't matter what pictures and videos are being shown to the public because what is important is what you know to be true.




And the smoke and mirrors haven't stopped at the 300th wing ding.  With what was supposed to be the twins' birthday on Dec 2 (*wink*), plane!anons have told us that the plane had zipped back to ATX and birthday pictures followed with the "confirming" location. 

Purposely "disjointed, chaotic" family narrative?  Nice touch! 

And this interesting OTP (somewhat) sighting at a Waffle House in Somewhere USA.

Hmmm, they're not in the same picture together, BUT....they're in pictures with the same people.  That means they were at the Waffle House together.  In Austin, TX.  And this time, Mgmnt is counting on the 2 + 2 equation to be deduced. 


 


 

 Which means they're not in Austin, Texas.   LOL!  Sorry, boys, no dice from this part of town.  ;-)

Narnia may have to make a Pet Smart run and get Jared and Jensen a hamster wheel for Christmas.  Same model as Jake and Austin's.  *wink*


******************

On my Twitter feed two days ago appeared this little flashback, gold nuggito, courtesy of Zayn Malik.  

Awwww!  A 2010 shoutout from Zayn to Mr. Liam Payne, talking about his man.  To temper his rather, er - possessive opening endearment of "my man" however, notice Zayn inserted the technique known as "diluting" by ending his tweet with the back-slapping term of "bro".  ;-)

 Much like Jensen and Jared have done in the past:


Or how about Harry calling Louis Tomlinson "pal"?  *wink*


Gotta love it.  Here was a memorable tweet from the J-men again.

 


 

Or "dude"??




And finally, "my boy"

The sentiments!!! "Pal".  "Bro".  "Dude".  "Brother".  They're sort of a garlic necklace, if you will.  

 Now, if we could just be a fly on the wall when the real endearments flow, right?  :-)

 Never a dull moment with our OTP's, is it?  

 Before we bid adieu, we'll give a lil' nod to our Jakers, who has slipped out of the shrubs "today" to take an alleged NYC walkabout with some "friends", aka people we've never seen before.  LOL!  No, no, no...one of them is supposed to be the elusive "Jeanne Cadieu", obviously subbing for the MIA Greta Caruso.  Ah well, nice to have a little variety!  And even though Jake is supposed to have shared his clothing with her, gone on a theater date with her, strolled the sidewalks of Greece with her over the summer......he appears to be unable to walk alongside Ms. Cadieu (and "friend") in New York "today".


LOL!  Nah, just kidding, just kidding.  Don't tempt me like this.

Good thing New York City has wide sidewalks!


*****************

This will be a two-post week as the illustrious M&M will be posting later this week, so we will look forward to seeing what she has to say.  And then Narnia Dispatches will take a holiday break.  We'll be around; if anything "breaking" or irresistible occurs, we'll be here to snark, I mean report about it.  

Thank you all so much for visiting Narnia and never fear, Tumblr may be imploding, but as long as we are allowed, Narnia Dispatches is going absolutely NOwhere.  We look forward to continuing our adventure.



pic sources:  giphy, gfycat, gifer, daily active Kenya, boing boing
our playlist:  Cherry Cherry Christmas - Neil Diamond
                     Give Me Christmas - Sidewalk Prophets
                     Christmas Time All Over the World - Sammy Davis Jr
                     Snowflakes of Love - Toni Braxton  


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3 comments:

prairiegirl said...

Awwww, I had to end with Patrick!!!! I LOVE him - he's the best, isn't he?? Patrick....Liam....Patrick...Liam.....it doesn't get any better!

I know, I'm ridiculous.

Look at Stymie!! LOL!!! Jake is Stymie with the He-Man Woman-Haters Club. What in the hell are those pictures about? Talk about a cut and paste job. Jake, take your beard Jeanne Cadieu to a Nets or Jets game, and get you both in the broadcast booth, THEN I'll believe you're in NYC.

And that picture of the Ackles. That thing looks like a cut and paste job to me. I think there's a dividing line right along the middle. Danneel is merged against the others and that's why her hand is smudged against Arrow.

Just my thought on it. Those guys and the kids weren't anywhere near Austin. That Waffle House moment was done for a purpose, which was to place them in Austin. No one is going to question it because hey, fans don't get date nights anymore, so what better way to place them there.

Phew. This post wore me out. I was delayed partly because when we got back from the lake, we came back to water leaking through the ceiling. Our neighbors had an issue with their washer and the ceiling was peeling in my bedroom and we had to have an emergency call. What a way to come home!

And so last night I had to clean my room because the contractors were going to come and patch things up. My room was TRASHED!!! It still is trashed because I just disguised all my crap and hid it in the closet or in drawers. LOLLLLL!

If anything happens that we can't resist posting about, we'll be sure and do it. Let's enjoy the holidays! For the first time in awhile, I'm not dogsitting any further this month and don't have anything lined up for awhile. I just want to enjoy Hallmark movies, get my shopping done, hopefully finish up my fairy Jack & Ennis fanfic and do nothing!! Do you ever feel that way?

And look at Jake "today". smh. *sigh*


Tuesday, December 4, 2018 at 9:28:00 PM CST
prairiegirl said...

Notice how blurred JJ's hand is as well. In the other picture, why is Arrow's skirt smudged? I don't imagine it would be that hard to cut/splice. Danneel's arms and clasped hands provide the dividing line to break up Arrow.

That these four just keep at it, pounding the same nail into the 2 x 4 over and over like they think they just can't seem to get the message home. What happened at the 300th episode was just unbelievable.

This was their show. They have been the stars, been the leads since the very first episode. And here you had the milestone 300th episode celebration and what did Mgmnt do? They separated them. And then they had Jensen yukking it up with the meard, Collins.

When the outcry became so loud at how obvious the separation was, here came the delayed pictures of the two men together.

And that was either jerking the fans around or one of the biggest, unforgivable mess-ups I've seen done to an OTP. Again - it tells us all they're still together, more than ever.

But a really lousy way to treat the show and its fans.

Tuesday, December 4, 2018 at 9:40:00 PM CST
prairiegirl said...

Well, mark this day down.

Jake joined social media today - Instagram.

Wednesday, December 5, 2018 at 6:25:00 PM CST

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