We here at Narnia are earnestly contemplating the latest social media contribution from none other than Austin Don Nichols, the taller half of one of our favorite OTP's, Jaustin - aka Jake Gyllenhaal and Austin Nichols.
What did he post to share with the world? Well,
Besides being able to read Austin's rarely-seen-anymore quirky way with words, Narnia was prompted to wonder out loud what inspired him to show off these halved hard-boiled creations? That is, besides the obvious opportunity to once again "hatch" his huge A initial, (since Austin's swaggering A and/or N have only "beanstalked" as the years have passed).
From The Day After Tomorrow era, here's his John Henry in the upper right corner,
to his One Tree Hill autograph, lower left corner this time,
evolving into the bold,
and then this one from 2012,
coming full circle as Spencer Monroe from The Walking Dead,
Whoa! Okay, back to Austin's protein construction,
and wondering why he chose to tweet about "deviling" eggs on a Thursday? Well, Narnia thought we'd throw out some ideas.
• Did the Gyllynichols Family purchase a new knife set and this was the first test? No lopsided or torn egg whites on those eggs, are there? Bravo on the carving technique, Big Guy!
• Austin wanted to show that the Gyllynichols Family's egg source fed their hens a diet rich in carotenoids as we look at the bright, dark yellow (almost orange!) yolk. Healthy eating has always been a mantra of Jake's, when Austin isn't leading him astray. ;-)
• Was Austin having a home schooling moment with their younger Baby Tiles? A is for Austin...
• The pic was taken just prior to Jakers trying his hand at duplicating The Spotted Pig recipe for their egg-strodinary deviled egg recipe since he presently has no access to the Greenwich Village eatery during the Covid-19 Stay At Home advisory.
• Austin thought he would take the opportunity to show a glimpse of that possible fine family eating table. Perhaps a product from his mother's side of the family's woodworking talents???
Well, an interesting and fun conundrum to ponder anyway, right? In any event, staying indoors may be causing the GyllyNichols clan to go a bit "stir" crazy in the kitchen. Ha!
~~~~~~~
And what about one of our other favorite OTP's, Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles? Well we here at Narnia had to laugh when true to form, Sony/Syco numbskulls had to show once again not only proof of life, but convenient "evidence" that the guys were tucked away, safe and sound but, first and foremost, nowhere near each other.
Suddenly an unexpected interview with Harry is released from BBC Radio 1Xtra with Finn O'Meally via phone on March 18.
Fenn takes over the Residency and is joined on the phone by Jorja Smith,
Harry Styles, Rejjie Snow, Maverick Sabre, Jarreau Vandal, Black Party,
Raye, Joey Purps and her dad!
One might observe without much effort that the interview was by phone so Harry could have been in England, right? Well, not so fast. First, Harry asked Feen, "What time is it over there?" Subtle Styles. And then we have these interesting pics that miraculously appear. We here at Narnia will let readers decide what the point of this strategic, well-timed drop was all about.
Okay, time's up!
Let's see that's supposed to be Harry behind the wheel, the hlupdate photo captioned "Harry out in LA" 18/03/20, feeding the narrative. Although contradicted by the peculiar Aug-20 Aug18 #coffee run in the tags, the point is to show that Harry was driving around in Fryman Canyon to be exact (how convenient for the pic to be taken right when he drove passed the location sign). And just in case people might confuse this Fryman Canyon with another one, a second photo emerges with no room left for discussion. Well, looky there. It's the Nancy Hoover Pohl Overlook at Fryman Canyon. You know the one in Los Angeles on Mulholland Drive, just copy/paste onto Google. [After all, Sony/Syco likes to make it easy, when they are spoon feeding a narrative to a fandom.]
Sure. One can definitely understand while in the middle of a pandemic Harry would choose to jump into his open air convertible and go for a coffee run to Fryman Canyon, with no social distancing in sight. Doesn't everybody go for a leisurely drive on a mountain trail in the middle of a deadly virus, fueled by stealth transmission? You know, instead of catching a plane back home so he's not stranded in LA away from his family for months upon months? By the way, there's a great cup of brew four miles away at Red Window Coffee. #JustSaying
We also loved the added touch (manip) of pasting in some brunet male and positioning him in a way that makes you think Harry's with some other guy (translation: not Louis). Jeff? Xander? Who knows? Except the guy is located in an unnatural way. If someone had truly been seated right next to Harry in the front passenger seat, it would have been impossible for the viewer to make them out because he would have been blocked by Harry's body. Not pushed backwards to see his upper body and head. C'mon. Please try harder next time, Jeffrey.
Louis, on the other hand, doesn't have as big a closeting budget as Harry so Sony/Syco just posted this on his Twitter account three days later to place him in England. @SkySports and Master's football reruns. Mission accomplished!
We feel you, Louis. We feel you.
BREAKING NEWS - March 31, 2020 - Harry participates in another interview with a British radio show (Heart Breakfast with Jamie Theakston and Lucy Horobin) to once again "confirm" he's stranded in Los Angeles. Or, as Harry laments, "I was trying to come home-and got a little stuck...." LOLLLLLLL!
Right. And yet, the UK is transporting citizens ("from young backpackers to retired couples on cruises") home with chartered flights, even as late as this week. But, poor, multi-millionaire Harry Styles who uses private jets for his travel needs, appears to be out of luck. Stuck. Stranded. Abandoned.
Never mind that Niall did a residency in LA for the James Corden show from March 9-12 and yet seemed to have no problem returning to London. Poor Harry, just can't seem to catch a break.
And then there was the third interview this time with another Brit, Capital Breakfast's Roman Kemp. We here at Narnia think this exchange was the best one of all because it was laden with adverb after adverb. "Honestly" and "Obviously" to go along with the multiple "Ultimatelys" from the earlier Zane Lowe interview. Sounds like someone else we know.
One almost wants to shed a tear when a contemplative Harry waxes philosophical about not being able to return home:
“I was really looking forward to coming home and spending some time with
my mum and sister, and my family, but it’s for the best,” he shared. Considering he was in London on February 18th for the Brit Awards and his sister Gemma was sitting right next to him, his bittersweet lament does sound a bit...well...insincere.
"But it's for the best???" LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! Obviously!
At this point, we're now taking bets to see how many more times Harry will have to confirm he's not with Louis in the next several weeks, perhaps months. Because that's what all these call-in conversations are all about.
BREAKING NEWS Deux - Overnight - on April 1 we wake up to this:
Who dat?
Could it be?
It's Harry Styles in LA!
Note that 'Free and Easy' is a company of one
of Jeffrey Azoff's cousins. And, of course, Columbia is his Sony owned record label. What a lucky break that Harry needed a logo-embellished hat and sweatshirt to wear
out for that pap stroll yesterday, don't you think? Got to make money for your masters, even during a pandemic. Apparently, calling into
radio shows to overshare his LA location was not enough this past week. Since some
kind of photographic evidence was needed to reinforce the narrative, might as
well make Harry into a walking billboard for merchandise. Kills two birds with one stone as it were. So much for
Harry's self-isolation pod. LA Paps have mouths to feed as well. In fact, to celebrity
Management Teams they are probably considered Essential Employees right now, along with
Doctors and Nurses!
Seriously though, so much effort to
"prove" Harry's not with Louis in England or that Louis is not with Harry in LA.
because here comes the bargain basement tweet from the man who "Dare not
speak his name". That's right, Louis Tomlinson's twitter account is set into motion UK time (11:20
a.m.). That is, unless Louis has insomnia and decided to casually tweet at 3:20 a.m. LA
time. So much effort to prove two people are not even on the same continent.
Louis in London. Niall in London. Liam in London. Harry in LA. Reminds us of when Sony/Syco was selling the idea that 1D shared a plane, minus Harry who flew by himself or stayed in a different hotel from the rest of the boys.
From December 4, 2014, The Guardian -
Some things never change. But another indication that the same narrative being shipped since 2016 by Sony/Syco is actually following a six year old+ pattern. One can see why both Louis and Harry had to both stay with the Sony "family." It's called The Coordinated Closet.
BREAKING NEWS - Trois - April 2, 2020 Guess what everybody? Did you know Harry is in LA?
BREAKING NEWS - Quatre - April 3, 2020 Hot of the press, well BBC Radio 2 anyway. Harry is interviewed early this morning by Simon Cowell minion, Dermot O'Leary, to...drum roll, please...remind everyone that Harry is quarantined in LA!!! We are not kidding, folks. Btw: O'Leary indicates that it's 6 a.m. in Los Angeles. Considering it's 5 a.m. in California right now that would not be possible. The time disparity suggests that the interview was done perhaps yesterday. Which would mean Sony/Syco is doing these prerecorded "interviews" in advance and perhaps rolling them out day by day for messaging purposes. That's how disinformation works. Rinse. Repeat. Spin Cycle.
https://soundcloud.com/harry-media-644074952/harry-on-bbc-radio-2-with-dermot-oleary
Dermot: How are you?
Harry: I’m very well, how are you?
Dermot: [a rushed “Yeah, not bad.” Immediately followed with] How
you coping? How long have you had lockdown for?
Harry: Uhhh, I think this is my Day 17. [March 18, 2020]
Dermot: Hmm.
Harry: I’m supposed to be home uh a couple of weeks ago. Uhm. But,
obviously the flying had gotten a bit strange so I’m in LA at the moment…
Dermot: [Tries to aggressively convince the listener that LA is
like a second home for Harry. Therefore it makes perfect sense that he should
be there.] But of the two places, Harry…were you able to call both home?
If you got enough there...for you to feel like you are at home though…for you
to feel like you’re at home there as well?
Harry: Uh, I mean I worked here a lot so I have like friends here
and stuff. And, I’m lucky enough to be quarantining with a couple of friends.
We all kinda started at the same time…with each other, which was nice. Uhm, but
yeah, I’m lucky to be here and to be with friends. Obviously to be someone who
can work from home is helpful. Yeah, it’s just a strange time.
[Then we learn that the friends Harry is
with are all working from home too. What a coincidence. We here at Narnia
wonder if this is a slow rollout so we can have Harry reveal later on (maybe on Day 38 - smirk) who these
close-quartered “friends” are so Sony/Syco can reinforce some other narrative. We are also told
about Harry’s routine for the day. And how his "friends" all eat as a group and come together in the evening. Then Dermot emphasizes how Harry’s
days are normally not structured at all. Get it? He’s just a rambling man when
he’s not on tour. No schedule. No commitments. No attachments. Just easy breezy. We
finally get a mention about his career (because that's really just a side topic
apparently) and Harry mentions that his UK and European tour are rescheduled
for next year. A brief plug for his new album. Don't want to spend to much time on that. Then back to the real purpose of
the interview. He’s in touch with his mum and sister nearly every day.
Checks-in in the morning. And then a creepy Dermot talking about how he has
nothing but love for Harry's mum and would gladly touch bases for Harry if he would
like. The connotation is obvious when Dermot chuckles like Snidely Whiplash as he says it.]
Analysis Interlude to stay grounded in reality:
Harry precisely pinpoints that he is on Day 17 of his quarantine during the O'Leary interview. This means he began his American lockdown on March 18th. (Coincidentally, Louis announced the cancellation of his UK Tour on March 16th.) This parallel is significant in that the 'Stay At Home' order in California happened March 19, with Newsom's televised address to Californians at 6:30 p.m. The Order was to go into effect at midnight. It's important to note as well that Newsom had already announced a State of Emergency in California as a result of COVID-19 as early as March 4, 2020. It makes no sense that Harry would not have flown out at that point, or at least soon thereafter. Yet, somehow, Harry, who was set to begin his UK tour in about a month, decided to linger in California instead. Hang around the city that he felt so tied to that he sold his house back in July 2019 and had already purchased not one, not two, but a third house in Hampstead, England in March 2020. Harry reportedly had already spent £12million on two houses in Hampstead,
From, Hello Magazine March 3, 2020:
And lastly, what's even funnier is that Harry somehow anticipated that he needed to quarantine on March 18, twenty-four hours before Governor Gavin Newsom did. LOLLLLLL!
______________
• While Austin was seeking the Golden Egg, his hubs was out of sight, having done his part to tell his fans what they needed to understand as far as his future companion during the coronapocalypse. As travel bans from overseas were imposed for 30 days on March 10, Mara & Company felt it was necessary to show Jake was doing what? Heading to the airport.
Need closer?
For these
pictures above were published just days before the nightmarish pictures from
the Chicago O'Hare airport as overseas travelers were returning to the
United States.
Okayyyyyyy...
But just like any other big event, even one as unprecedented and dangerous as the current pandemic coronavirus, publicists and marketers are making sure to portray their clients in a certain way.
With the double event - a beard's birthday and #coronalockdown, here was Jensen with the Instagram post, along with replies by meard/faux marriage endorser Jeffrey Dean Morgan and real-life partner, Jared Padalecki:
And Jared's beard, Genevieve Cortese with the usual, "not pictured, three kids" excuse, I mean explanation for Padakid absences:
And Danneel has to chime in to sell #coronalockdown with her insinuation that she'll be taking her "hubs" to task with bellydance lessons.
Interesting, there's an NFL marketer running with that same idea.
With several replies calling the 2020 Super Bowl MVP a "simp", one has to wonder what on earth his marketing representative is thinking with this tactic?
Whew! Enough of that, right? Let's end this Musings on a fun contemplation, shall we?
All five men have changed since this picture. They have grown and evolved into their own fine, outstanding entities.
Mr. Liam Payne
Mr. Harry Styles
Mr. Zayn Malik
Mr. Niall Horan
and Mr. Louis Tomlinson
What a fine group of young men they have continued to be!
Everyone stay tuned; this was an impromptu post while I complete Pt 5 of 5 of my Winter/Spring Musings which better get completed before summer gets here. LOL!! Ha ha, it's really not funny. But you know.
I'm off to work tomorrow; big thanks to M&M for her valuable contributions and please everyone, take care during this global sharing event of ours.
Collaboration: PG and Methodical Muser
pic sources: Daily Fail, Metro News, APKPure, IHJ, giphy
our playlist: Morning Has Broken - Neil Diamond
Canyon Moon - Harry Styles
Through the Hourglass - Gizmo Varillas
