Detention Time with Jake Gyllenhaal and his Band of Merry Grammers

Narnia comes to our blog today not to ignore what is going on in America currently, but to focus for just a while, on what we do.   

Seven (7) years ago today, we want to tip our hat and acknowledge a special anniversary in Jake and Austin's joint history. 

The Club Lounge.

The wrap-up can be read here from our 30 Days of Toothy Tile, Grey Goose and the Baby Tiles - Day 25, which chronicles the tweet sighting of Jake at the Ritz Carlton Club Lounge in L.A., the days leading up to the sighting and the PR Repair afterwards.

The day we began talking on Oh My Godot blogspot in the unlikely post "Looking for Loki", but one which served as a vessel for a classic case of a pr team's intern being sent in to dispute and discourage discussion occurred.  The visit was a classic example of the many times a troll took up residence on an OMG thread, persistent in arguing and usually culminating with personal attacking, as evidenced by the deletion of comments.

And the next day, June 2, on one of Special's Out Spotlight's which focused on Sam Harris, the discussion turned to the PR Repair as Jake was suddenly photographed "arriving" into Los Angeles at LAX in some of the most ridiculous "pap" pics he'd had to do.  And these airport photos were some of the last that we've seen Jake do ever since.  In an excellent analysis of the LAX photos by Special K, called "A Little Song and Dance",  some good points are made and M&M provides excellent explanations and scenarios.  (This particular author only irritated and attracted the ire of a scoffer. Sorry, Special! 😞 lol)

Clearly, this was a memorable moment in Baby Tile lore and one of the last of the organic sightings we've had of either Jake or Austin.  Now, they "slip through the cracks on purpose" on social media, barring the organic Romulus flight sighting (covered in the November 30, 2016 post "One If By Tile, Two If By @Austinnichols Family").  

Aaaaah, good times!  Today, we remember fondly.  Hard to believe it's been seven years.


→→→→→→→

While Jake has disappeared again into his prairie dog hole, and we entertain ourselves with recycled, old pictures -

Wait, what?  What did you say?  There are some new pictures of Jake?  Where?  What's he doing?  And they're nice ones?

Well, we at Narnia Dispatches are very sorry to say that we cannot share them.  You see, this literal smattering of unseen photos of Jake look to be current (we assume because of the "Prince of Persia"-like length of his brunette locks),

but we don't know that for certain only because well, the photos are difficult to locate the original source, even though the account with the watermark all over them refers those who ask "Where did you get these pictures?", to reach out to @CriterionCollection.  

It would seem the screencaps likely come from a "new interview" with the actors and others associated with the film Wildlife and is a bonus feature of the DVD.  Apparently, @jakey_gyllenhaal (a "fanpage" Instagram account) had her copy of the DVD express shipped because just three (3) days later after the DVD was available on release , here she is with HD HQ screencaps from the interview.

With her watermark on them.

When another supposed Jake Instagram fan account (@jakegyllenhaalphoto) re-posts two of the new photos, they are scolded by yet another Jake account (@gyllenatic) for "stealing!!" the photos from @jakey_gyllenhaal, whom we must now assume has exclusive rights to the HD HQ photos. @gyllenatic proceeds to then tattle of this horrific crime to two additional Jake fan accounts, who then come scurrying over to also hurl stones at @jakegyllenhaalphoto.

And then the other half of the Jake Cavalry, aka @chaoticjakekilledthedinosaurs, came over with their ruler.

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.   Pardon this author while she steps outside for a moment to have a private moment of being humored.

I don't know, but I think we here at Narnia have ridden this merry-go-round before and the source of the gall was our old friend from the past, jakebullshittingovereverybody.  😉

What is also fascinating over this policing and fretting over "photo credits" and "stealing from the internet", is this same account who created the fabulous "edit", also posted this interesting photo,

Entitled "Jake with tattoos", this photo seems to show our Jakers with tats on both forearms!  When did he get those?  They must be real because there does not look to be a hashtag of "manip" or "filter" or "specialedit", etc. in that mass listing of hashtags. They do not appear to be from his Southpaw filming days as his character's arms did not have tattoos in that area of his forearms.  Perhaps from Prisoners?  Just askin'.


Jake's team seems a bit obsessed with controlling pictures of their client, don't they?  


Now comes this new friendly and helpful warning from a Wiki How about posting photos on your Blogger page.  Dated May 14, 2020:

Hmmm.  Wow, Blogger.

Lucky for these Jake fanpages, Instagram is more of a leash-free dog park, so to speak, huh?  Because otherwise, the "fanpage" Instagram account would've had to order the DVD, receive the package in the mail within three (3) days, in order to have time to contact Criterion Collection (and receive a reply) for permission to create those HD HQ screen caps of Jake from the interview, not to mention an actual video clip, in order to post them on her Instagram page.  Phew!


I'm just asking, just asking.  Pondering out loud.  Speculating.  Entertaining ideas.




HAPPY CLUB LOUNGE DAY, everyone.  

pic sources:  gfycat, giphy, gifer, WikiHow, ritz
                     carlton via viewfromthewing
our playlist:  Teacher, Teacher - .38 Special
                     Teacher, I Need You - Elton John (Live in Kansas 
                                                          City)
                     Love is in Control - Donna Summer

The Wheels on the Family Truckster Go 'Round and 'Round

When someone's been MIA since Sunday's day of work....

When a robot like the one below, which has over 143,000 Likes and 24,000 Retweets, suffocates that certain someone's twitter search right out of oxygen:

When that certain someone is mostly seen only on the cover of Playbill photos posted on Instagram the past several days...

Not to mention the huge story of Sony vs. Disney hitting on Tuesday, August 20th, and drowning out everything....except for Tom Holland.

And then, when an "old friend" re-emerged from the Instagram dark hole, suddenly inspired to share a plethora of old memories and a few "new/old"ones.... Hello, Old Friend.

Let's just say, the last 24 hours has been wild. None of these actions, have convinced Narnia that "someone" was working this week. Who knows how this "best actor of his generation" is able to summon all his power to hide such an absence? Does he have an understudy going on for him this week? Are this week's shows scheduled on the official calendar, but tickets not available because anyone trying to buy one is met with the message of, "Sold Out?"

What is it about this particular week of August for this certain someone and his special someone?  Was it one last gasp before summer officially ends?  A family getaway before the madness begins? 

Some school districts have already started, others will begin next week.  For those of you whose little one is starting their first year of all-day classes, we know it can be tough.  This is a nice poem found online from a teacher:

It never gets easier!  And now, it's time to shape up to ship out, and don't forget to set those alarm clocks.  :-)


pic sources:  seroundtable
our playlist:  Sounds of Silence - Simon and Garfunkel
                     Suddenly, Last Summer - The Motels
                     We Go Together - The Motels
 

Sunday Late Evening Almost Monday Morning Musings - Milestone Bdays, It's a Boy! and a Social Media Calling Out

Warning:  sexually explicit content in the third bullet point


via GIPHY 


LOL!  Happy Sunday to all! We have three current topics to hit, so let's get to it and not waste any further MB space.

• Our first bullet point is an update on our invigorated OTP (should I say risen-from-the-ashes?).  So yesterday, third baseman Mike Moustakas (he is the MLB free agent still without a team) tweeted this:

Best offseason ever. This morning we were blessed with a beautiful baby boy. Michael Carter Moustakas. My wife is an absolute rockstar. I love our growing family. pic.twitter.com/Zaa7bZKOYA

— Mike Moustakas (@Mooose_8) March 3, 2018

 
Whoa! Who knew?  Well, if one was an Instagram follower of "wife" Stephanie Moustakas, there would be no doubt since there are numerous baby bump photos.  But if you just checked in on Moose's Instagram, there wasn't any clue except for this picture, which disguised the obvious sign of an upcoming addition of a new family arrival with strategic placement:

So congratulations are in order to Mike and his social media replies were lit with similar sentiment.  So were there any from former teammates?  There was - from KC Royal pitcher Danny Duffy.  Some may remember from Narnia's post When You Know You've Been Around These Bases Before-MLB Free Agency 2018 cont., Danny was featured in an article as being Eric Hosmer's "best teammate ever".  Danny tweet replied his congratulations and Hos? Well, Hos piggybacked on his cyber high-five with a retweet:

And the Signing Watch continues with Mike "Moose" Moustakas still without a team to play on this coming major league season.  We here at Narnia have got our eye on where he'll end up!

• Something rather Padackles historic happened late yesterday.  Video was posted of Jared Padalecki with JJ Ackles, Jensen Ackles' eldest daughter. 

Cute video of Jared and JJ 😂 pic.twitter.com/FzCCZg5HUZ

— JENSEN ACKLES SOURCE 📂 (@jacklesnet) March 4, 2018

 
And this author doesn't care what fan tries to come up with a story of some "deleted pic" which existed before, there has not been a photo or video of Jared with JJ.  There have been a few random mentions on con stages from the two men that Jared has been in JJ's vicinity (sarcastic exaggeration),  but there has not been visible evidence like there has been with the Padalecki boys and Jensen.  Perplexing?  Yes, it has been.  But regardless, last night there it was.  And granted equal time at this Jensen Ackles 40th birthday bash held (of course, did you think anywhere else?) at the Family Business Brewery (FBB); we had video of Jensen with Tom Padalecki nearby and watching some game playing.  So, it was First Born privileges!

@JensenAckles and Tom @TheFamilyBeer pic.twitter.com/etkinQOrGI

— glen (@moosesquirrel4) March 4, 2018

Jensen showing fine 40ish form, isn't he?  Even throwing a darn bean bag, lol.  

Two parties who are notably absent in these videos, but are front and center in this below photo (amongst many other fan photos):

Hmmmm...well, getting a wee bit closer to that money shot, aren't they?  Not quite there yet.  But a fanny pat for the college try.

Happiest of birthday wishes to Jensen and indeed it was wonderful to see Jared with JJ. This particular author is still trying to recover from the unexpectedness of it all.  2018's season has certainly been one for highly unusual activity and patterns, hasn't it?


•  There is new and out-of-pattern, and then there's just plain ol' re-doing.  During the time of Jake Gyllenhaal's BFF Chris Fischer's hinky "wedding", we at Narnia had taken notice of an alleged fan Instagram account which was providing all the pics 'n news from the event for all Jake fans.  jakebullshittingovereverybody is the term this author prefers to use, but in reality and for archival purposes, I must begrudgingly refer to its real name, jakeovereverything.  Let's take a look at its latest post, which tells fans of a traffic/pedestrian run-in Jake recently had:

Are we to assume this is a picture taken by the pedestrian who had the encounter since the account administrator says the civilian shared this story with her? I assume that is the reason for the "story exclusive" watermark?  As a follower of Jake for quite awhile, I have become accustomed to seeing this narrative of Jake being an aggressive driver, rude to pedestrians, rude to fans, disgruntled with paparazzi (actually, rather aggressive in this photo below!)

And did we not witness him peeling out in a car that night outside of the Buffalo Club with beard, Reese Witherspoon?  

And yet, this story...

via GIPHY 

Who is the witness?  How is it a fan picture was taken in the heat of the moment before the confrontation?  This civilian just happened to be familiar with jakeovereverything and shared her/his story of a Jake encounter?  This version of events does GPS-locate Jake in southern Cali as his people have been trying to do since Fischer's "wedding".  

A similar re-posting is this one, which is from another alleged fan encounter on Nov 16, 2014. Jake is pictured with writer Nick Payne in this photo,

which was one of several photos supposedly taken on November 16th.  We're not sure who this "fan" is who says they asked Jake for a picture and was told "No, but have a nice day."  The original source, like many of the posts on this account, is not referenced.  In addition, there is a "jakeovereverything" watermark on this picture.  A watermark is generally used on a photo or piece of artwork to show ownership.  Well, this photo can be found on this Gyllybabble MCM post (from November of 2014) and without a watermark, so there seems to be some kind of conflict going on or perhaps fraud! [Interesting isn't it, that supposedly Jake told the fan "No, but have a nice day" to a photo, but yet there are other photos from inside Momofuku that evening?]

Another peculiar time capsule look-back:  the Adam Levine Out Magazine "Stop thinking Jake is gay!" interview and  cover story.

Then there's this post on a future flick of Jake's, Velvet Buzzsaw:

This post has a quote from a supposed film discussion website called "kanye to the", but the site is not secure, so just keep that in mind if you decide to go check it out.  It is not clear at this time that the film Velvet Buzzsaw is going to be a female oral sex documentary (wink), but this write-up seems to be hinting of an inside track, doesn't it? Wonder what they know that we don't? Guess the rest of us will find out when trailers are released.  I wonder how many months of ride-along's Jake has already spent "researching" this role?  LOL!

Ahem.   Excuse this writer for getting sidetracked.  On a more serious note and the real purpose of our third bullet point, there is one post that Narnia will not let go without a calling out.  Dates can be fudged, sources ignored, and narratives followed.  But when an event involving Jake Gyllenhaal and Austin Nichols is "re-written" to exclude and write out Austin, Narnia Dispatches will speak loud and clear against a stone and chiseled tactic which has Jake's Team written all over it.


"Jake Gyllenhaal and Adam Levine":

  and on a photo that is clearly Jake and Austin, the author writes "Jake and Adam Levine with friends".  

Again with the "Jake and Adam Levine with friends"

In a photo op (meaning this was not a per chance paparazzi sighting) which focused on Jake and Austin leaving together with the Old Man and showed Levine leaving by himself on a motorcycle, the deliberate re-writing of this gift to Jaustin fans is inexcusable.  

Narnia will continue to monitor any future re-writes involving Jake and Austin.  We will not be hesitant to re-write the re-write.  There are hundreds of other opportunities, other fellow co-stars and friends, other lunches, other dinners, man-hugs, mutual bro finger pointing, sidewalk strolls, concerts and ballgames to rearrange and play around with.  

THIS was Jake and Austin's moment.  Leave it alone.

And on that note, y'all have a great Monday and return to work!

pic sources:  eonline, Giphy, acklesforlife tumblr, imgur
our playlist:  Something to Believe In - Tall Tales & the Silver
                                                            Lining
                     Monday, Monday - The Mamas and the Papas
                     Precious Illusions - Alanis Morissette