In our previous post, Methodical Muser brought up this footnote:
Just a Jakey G. thought experiment for some more closeted entertainment: As we have mentioned, we here at Narnia have been on baby bump “watch” since May 2021 when he and his team used the promo for Spirit Untamed to plant a sprouting seed about him being a dad someday, and Jake dutifully recited his lines to perfection, “I think it’s getting to be time.” It truly has been fun seeing more interviews and events continue to reinforce a future narrative of “I can’t be gay because I have a child” story line. His people, for instance, made sure everyone saw him at the Venice Film Festival with photo and videos everywhere, walking the red carpet with his sister, schmoozing with peers, so giddy you would think that he had a movie in competition, instead of his sibling. VFF was the perfect occasion for his beard to show up and push heavy on the hetero pedal. Yet, by Jake being in so many videos with his sister, one could not help but notice that his beard was conspicuously missing in action. Hmm, why not have Cadieu on his arm instead of his sister, which frankly looked all kinds of peculiar? Could it be that Jake wanted to convince folks that he and “girlfriend” broke up? Nah, that would be so 20th century Hollywood. Contemporary closeting is all about the babies. So perhaps Venice was all about reminding folks that Jake’s beard was not there for a reason other than a breakup? Perhaps something more maternal in nature? Today, we get another curious comment from Jake planted in a The Sunday Times Style section (UK) interview today.
“I have realised how much more
fun I would like to be. So that’s a big thing. I’m trying to push through that.”
Fun? Really? And who might Jake want to
have “fun” with that he doesn’t have in his life right now? LOL! Jakey you are just so darn transparent.
We are truly looking forward to further PR-created clue dropping. Maybe Jake
will show up with a pacifier in his mouth during one of his upcoming interviews.
It certainly would coincide with the infantile storytelling being unfurled with
each passing month. Developing story.
Stay tuned. Please don't disappoint us. - Narnia Dispatches post, "Shevine Sunday: Who Aligned Their Planets Anyway?", Sept. 26, 2021
And what happened hours later that evening of Sunday, September 26? Well, out of nowhere, here came photos on Instagram of beard Jeanne Cadieu, who was allegedly at the Tony Awards. Yet, the only time we saw her was after the Tony's were over, and Cadieu's image was strategically placed in front of a Tony's red carpet backdrop.
We were privy to side-by-side images of the elusive couple:
Cadieu's Instagram account posted a photo as well, with a cryptic caption of "About last night" and crediting Prada and Cartier for advertising purposes.
In addition, there have been other alleged Jake fan accounts and anti-Cadieu accounts re-posting the photo of her and stalking other posts, calling Cadieu out for being racist, and also for not walking red carpets with Jake, therefore making their relationship a "PR" relationship.
Look at that! Narnia "like-minded", calling out PR relationships. (Wondering why they aren't following goosestile??? 👀 )
And the Daily Fail with the out-in-the-open article, pointing out that yes indeed, Cadieu did NOT walk the carpet with Jake. It's even in the title! "but duo walk the red carpet separately".
And the Daily Fail article even points out in the second paragraph that Jake, 40, "BOLDLY" walked the red carpet alone. Btw, now wondering if this claim is a nod to Jake's godmother, Jamie Lee Curtis who referred to Jake as "brave" in her recent Instagram post? Perhaps these are cryptic comments pointing towards an unknown future event, who even knows.
What on earth are Jake and his team doing? 😬 Narnia is as fascinated as you with this train ride.
But one thing seems certain in these parts. Cadieu suddenly thrust in front of a Tony's backdrop not only later in the evening, but obviously without a "moon-bump", smacks of a knee-jerk reaction to prove wrong, the recently posted speculations on the "it's getting to be time" shenanigans that Team Jake has been up to. Let's not forget that there had also been an obvious reaction to Narnia's post, "Jake Gyllenhaal's Career Re-Emergence : Stinkgate or BabyGate?" back on September 1. After pointing out how the model hadn't shown any signs of working since at least June, suddenly the model began Instagram posting several times to insinuate she was working again, beginning with this one from Sept. 9, where she is shown with a suspicious-looking bloat condition going on:
On Sept 11, a tri-pic post,
And Sept 13, which was an above-shoulder shot, but all three posts were to cover for Cadieu not being seen accompanying Jake to Venice, after not showing signs of working all summer. Not to mention most of the pictures being suspicious in nature with billowing smocks or bunched belts, further gaslighting at its finest.
So, is the #BabyTileSynthetic course being altered now?
Who knows, with the multiple directions the train seems to be moving in? When Jake is posing with former Sunday in the Park With George co-star Annaleigh Ashford and there are planted comments speculating if they're the couple? 👀👀
 |
| Ashford pulling the Blake Lively/Ryan Reynolds pose 😉 |
And then today, a newly added pose is gaslighting at its (former beard) Greta Caruso/Gyllenhaal finest:
💕 I dunnooooo...maybe Mara thinks Jake needs one of those cheating scandals to help get him down a wedding aisle. And the theater/television actress already looks like someone willing to play the game. After all, Ashford and Jake have already talked about breast pumps, remember that one?
Hmmm...
Don't rule anything out at this point!
And then, Austin popped up out of nowhere yesterday with....another dog.
At this point, Narnia was about to start thinking Austin and Jake were moving on to start a kennel of pups like they did with offspring, but alas, Austin replies to someone that it is a "friends puppy". Narnia noticed that the intern, I mean that Austin, who was a writing major, forgot his possessive apostrophe. 👀😏 Just keeping all of our pins straight on the board! Also adding the "English setter" puppy identification and "Mabel name" pins. Consistency is the key!
LOL!!! 😂😁😂
This "story telling" by Jake and his team is looking to be taking on some real periods of off-the-cuff "winging it". Only they know where it's going, but Narnia will be ready to be a witness, along with his other fans.
pic sources: giphy, Daily Fail, pinterest
our playlist: Everyone's Agreed (That Everything Will Turn Out Fine) - Steelers Wheel
Tough Guys - REO Speedwagon
The Show Must Go On - Three Dog Night
