Friday, August 31, 2018

The Summer of Jake Gyllenhaal and his "BFF" Austin Nichols - Huzzah!



Don't look now, but one of our fave Fab Duos, Austin Nichols and his cashmere-lovin' SO of 16 years, Jake Gyllenhaal, are putting themselves in the public position of both being across the pond AT THE SAME TIME.


Oh.  OOps!! shhhhh, we'll say it quietly.

Now, it remains to be seen whether or not the mere possibility of a crossing of the streams will continue to be allowed to exist, but for now, let's update everyone's Outlook calendar.  What's going on?

Well, Jake has been wandering around the UK and allegedly Greece since the spring, believe it or not.  Let's see. Where was he last photoshopped, I mean seen?  At a pub!  This was supposedly on Sunday, Aug 26.
A post shared by Jake Gyllenhaal Fan Acct (@jakeovereverything) on

And before that?  Well, this is supposed to be Jake (of course, from behind) walking in Greece with his girlfriend! How do we know this is his girlfriend? Because one of the planted comments tells us so!  Grab some binoculars and take a look.


 

I dunno......has anyone seen his dopelganger, Calgon, I mean Caglar lately?  Anyway, another space shuttle video for all to try to decipher.  And who shot that video?  What uncanny timing, huh?

 And let's not forget about this great Colorforms™ picture, which is supposed to be Jake swimming in the sea with someone and a human shark photobombing them, I think.  Here is Colorforms Jakers:

 Um, I think someone got a little carried away with the cropping and sliced Jake's profile a bit too close.  ;D  Of course, once again, we're not sure who it is that is supposed to have taken this photo, perhaps a passing fisherman?  Merman?  

Jake's also been taking in some theater when in London, spotted dining out and taking pictures with fellow WME/Endeavor client Burt Bacharach.  And although we're not sure when he posed for the shoot, the interview is for GQ France, the photographer named Shayne Laverdiere. [The photographer splits time between Montreal, Toronto and Paris.]  

Oh, filming, you say?  No, we don't have any Spidey set photos, sorry!  But plenty of other recreational and relaxation activities.

And what about Austin?  Well, he's been hammock swingin', 


visiting barber shops, drinking wine allegedly at a birthday party of an enabling Walking Dead former co-star:

 working out in a front yard,

working out with balcony railings,


 

standing under waterfalls in Hawaii, 

 

writing love poetry to former co-star Andrew Lincoln, pretending to attend an Oceana event (in front of yet another railing)


 
 
playing Olympian,


being part of a "perfect couple":


 

Colorforms™ Austin here standing with a male individual and getting part of his elbow snipped a little too close, a la Jake's swimming pic:

 
and standing at balconies,

Whoa!  ;-)

Well, we reckon it's pretty obvious to see why Austin had to turn down that co-lead part in the upcoming CW series, In the Dark, isn't it? He's just much too "busy". Although it does look like he is making ample use of that SAG card off screen. I wonder how residual payments are calculated for bearding projects? Something to ponder, indeed.

Then there was this little heads up a couple of days ago. Austin's flying! Of course we doubt whether he is really taking his long legs onto Southwest Airlines, but perhaps he simply felt like "stopping by" because he was running ahead of schedule and just wanted to take a pic to capture the moment? What a guy!


 

And Austin's throwing a few things into his carry-on and taking a hop, skip & a jump over to where?  To the Salento Film Festival, held in Tricase, Italy, where he will be squiring his beard Hassle "Hassie" Harrison around.

The Iron Orchard showing in Italy is sure coming in handy, isn't it? As the screenshot shows, Austin is going to be Q & A'ing with the beard on Saturday, Sept. 1.

And the hubs?  Well, might Jake just come out of paparazzi hiding in time for the Venice Film Festival, where his film The Sisters Brothers will show on September 2?

 September 1, Austin in Tricase, Italy......

 September 2, Jake in.....Venice, Italy.....

Austin in Tricase, Italy on Sept 1....

 Jake in Venice, Italy on Sept 2...

The only problem is that one of those other Jake blogs is telling everyone to cool their jets, because that ubiquitous anonymous commenter has inside information they generously "dropped by" to share with everyone:

"I read that neither Jake or Joaquin will attend Venice due to work Schedule, but I don't know if the info is right"

And of course, when you look at the official poster released yesterday Aug 30, well, Jake's nowhere to be seen:

 

With this in mind, it's likely Jake is not on screen that much, which of course would offer an explanation for not showing up at Venice either.  Apparently, Jake has developed a phobia about film festivals, barring Toronto, hasn't he?  

NONEtheless, we hope Jake and Austin enjoyed their "we" time in Hawaii, perhaps taking their treehouse and hot tub proclivities to the "isolated" Aloha side of Hana, Maui.  Their very own version of hanging loose. Mahalo, baby!

Meanwhile, the rest of us get to enjoy the "scenery" of gymnast rings, balcony leaning, and human shark photobombing.  LOL!!

As we wrap up, on a more analytical, serious note amidst some of the chortling and laser pointing, notice the trend with both Jake and Austin.  For Austin, there have been Walker Stalker convention participations in London, One Tree Hill in France, supposed travels to Portugal and Hawaii.  For Jake?  What is alleged to be a long filming stint where and during what season (the summer)?  London.  Placement in Greece.  In 2017, The Sisters Brothers was supposed to film where and when?  Almaria, Spain and when?  The summer.  In Spain, even though the story actually is to take place in Oregon and San Francisco, but instead the production goes all the way to Spain?

And yet, we have more alleged "out and about" photos of Jake from overseas than we ever see anymore when he's supposed to be in the States. Notice the beards his team has paired him with.  In 2016, it was Katja Tausig. Where is she from?  London.  His bearding photo op with Katja came on the heels of filming Life with Ryan Reynolds and when was this?  During the summer. In London.

Also seen with a British born gal Anna Libon in Chelsea, London in 2015.  During what month?  June.  Bearded heavily with Greta Caruso where?  In Italy at the very end of May 2015 and St. Bart's during New Year's 2017. While she is American, these were two extended "vacations" and they weren't on American soil.  

The latest beard?  "Jeanne Cadieu" from Montreal, Quebec.  If it's not London, Italy or France for Jake and Austin, there's a Montreal, Vancouver or Toronto connection.  Where is he alleged photo'd with her? Overseas.  


And how about Big Sis, Maggie?  Whom we haven't seen all summer either?  Where's she been hiding?  Well, here's where WME/Endeavor is working at placing her ('working at' is used in the most lenient of terms!)


 

Oh look...also during the summer.  Of 2017.


 

2016?  Vermont.  When?  The summer.

  

Oh, and look, even in 2015!


 

Even though we have no pictures, of course because well, there are not paps in Vermont, are there?  How fortunate for Big Sis and the alleged, ne'er-seen-anymore Peter Sarsgaard!  ;-)  Guess that was great thinking on "their" part, wasn't it? This summer, Mgmnt came up with a legitimate reason for them to actually be in Vermont:

A rare, public appearance today for the "couple".

 In this August 19, 2018, Just Jared post, notice what is said:

The 40-year-old The Deuce actress was spotted picking up some pastries on the way back to her hotel on Sunday (August 19) in New York City. - "back to her hotel"

Odd.  Not back to the brownstone?

Neither sibling is even selling "living" in New York City anymore.  It's not difficult to arrive at the conclusion that Jake, Austin, their kids, Maggie and her daughters and likely the matriarch, Naomi Foner, are rarely in the United States anymore, let alone New York City.  They're spending the majority of their lives now beyond the borders.  Notice how pap agencies are rarely used anymore with Jake.  He's seen in Instagram pictures. Hinky looking "twit" pictures.   

Secrets to hide like a communal lifestyle, a marriage between Jake and Austin, and real life fatherhood for two men who are supposed to be swinging bachelors.  Aaaah yes.  

Hello, reality.


via GIPHY



pic source:  pinterest, IHJ, giphy, Google maps, Salento Film
                   Festival, Mrwgifs, Univ of Toronto
our playlist: Musetta's Waltz - Moonstruck soundtrack
                   It Must Be Him - Vicki Carr
                   Stornelli amorosi - Claudio Villa
                  
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Wednesday, August 29, 2018

25 Years for Mr. Liam Payne - Happy Birthday from Narnia Dispatches




Somebody very special in Narnia world turned the big 25 today and his name is Mr. Liam James Payne!!!

We hope that he had the loveliest of days and wish him an upcoming year of good health, safety, a lot of love and professional success.  Best of everything and keep on smiling.













































 



















Hope it was splendid, Liam!


pic sources:  pinterest,  Independent, Daily Fail, Official Charts,
                     justapayneaway
our playlist:  I've Got the World on a String - Bobby Caldwell
                     Good Morning Starshine - Oliver
                     Once in a Lifetime - One Direction

                       
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Sunday, August 26, 2018

Simon Cowell's Walk of Shame Ceremony: Star Gazing Fakery In Plain Sight


On June 22, 2018, Simon Cowell was announced as one of twelve inductees to receive a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in the category of Television.  Although honorees have two years to schedule their ceremony, what a surprise that a mere eight weeks later, Cowell used the opportunity to promote his largesse image, along with the upcoming 15th season of the X-Factor on ITV, set to air in the UK on September 1, 2018.  

After noticing the expedited timeline for Cowell's induction ceremony, it would be an error in judgment to simply correlate the breakneck speed of the event with a marketing scheme to raise broadcast ratings. Especially, since the X-Factor has a British audience, hardly impressed with some American sidewalk installation of an embedded star for a show that in 2015 garnered only 5.95 million viewers during its final show; in 2016 5.5 million; and in 2017 an abysmal 4.4 million. By comparison, X-Factor's head-to-head competitor, Strictly Dancing, brought in nearly 10 million viewers last December.

 To show how far Cowell has fallen throughout the years, let's compare these steadily declining numbers with the remarkable headline from December 2010, when One Direction competed in X-Factor's Final Three category.
 

X Factor final peaks at nearly 20 million viewers

• The X Factor surges to record with a 55% audience share

Which now brings us back to last Wednesday, August 22 and Simon Cowell's personal induction ceremony in Los Angeles. It  was no surprise that Cowell made sure that the house was packed with cameras and those kinds of celebrity types who most likely were made the kind of offer they simply could not refuse. From Kelly Clarkson to Adam Lambert to David Foster, and Heidi Klum. All there to effusively shower Cowell with congratulations and extravagant words of praise. No surprise there considering that a once leaked X-Factor contract, which ran for 80 pages, also reportedly stated that the rules were enforceable anywhere "in the world and solar system" and that artists may not be "considered unduly negative, critical or derogatory of the company – – including its personnel and, in particular, Simon Cowell".  That's right.

In particular, Simon Cowell

With that background in mind, two particular notables attended the gathering which stood out not only because of their relationship to Simon Cowell, but because of their association with each other;  Louis Tomlinson, and one of Cowell's longtime friends and collaborators Sony Music Entertainment's CEO, Rob Stringer. The latter's connection dating back over fifteen years to the beginnings of Syco Entertainment in 2002.

 Curiously enough though, Rob Stringer, who was ranked in 2018 as No. 5 on Billboard Music's POWER 100 (just a notch below Irving Azoff) did not sit next to the man of the hour, Simon Cowell; the guy who was supposed to be his longtime business associate as well as friend. But, instead was strategically seated right next to Louis Tomlinson. 




Rob Stringer's chair next to Louis, just in case

Brings back murky memories of another curious moment of the two together, just after One Direction's Hiatus from Hell began, and only three weeks after the "birth" of Fraudie (oops! I meant Freddie) "Tomlinson" became tabloid fodder. Because after the photo op below, Louis never attended another high profile music industry event in America that year (or since, for that matter), yet somehow he found the time just a few weeks after his "Daddy Cool" image had been officially unleashed upon the public to pop in for some post-Grammy mingling. Almost like Mr. Stinger, or is it Stringer? (snark) wanted to prove to the world that his hands were clean of any rumored involvement with Louis' current "baby" situation, the continued enforced public separation of Louis and Harry, or the carefully packaged hiatus of One Direction. Surely a prominent ringleader of such shenanigans would not want to be photographed with his most visible closeted victim. Right? I mean who cares that Louis looks like he would rather be gnawing that guy's hand off rather than faking a smile for the camera.



Sony Music Entertainment February 15, 2016 Post-Grammy Reception 

Fast-forward to Cowell's Hollywood Walk of Fame ceremony last week and weirdly enough Simon's close buddy is not seated next to him in rank or status as a fellow music titan. Instead, Robbie-boy is positioned right next to Louis Tomlinson. Optically hinting, like a sledgehammer against a window pane, that they must be best buds and on the best of terms. Right? In other words, no bad blood between those two. At least in front of the cameras that is.  In fact, both Stringer and Cowell seemed overly intent to use this special occasion, with the constant hugs, fake smiles and Stringer's awkward head on Louis' shoulder gesture, to create video and other photographic evidence that they were not only close to Louis Tomlinson, but that Louis "adores" them as well. Put another way, nothing to see here. Those fandom rumors about Louis' career being sabotaged have to be false. Right? So what if Louis still has not released that album he's been talking about for well over a year. Who cares if his twitter account, with nearly 33 million followers, is never used to promote his music. Surely, it means nothing that Louis' amazing "Miss You" record received zero promotion after Cowell so "magnanimously" allowed the song to be sung on his X-Factor show in December, 2017. Just enough effort on Cowell's part to make it seem like he was supportive of Louis' work.

All that "Attaboy, Louis" messaging, obviously designed to distract from what's really going on behind the scenes. Sony/Syco's gaslit business model of appearing to be encouraging, while undermining Louis' career at every opportunity. A steady stream of fake girlfriends, baby stunts, lack of music promotion and industry support, and the creation of a chav persona meant to portray Louis as a reckless and irresponsible guy.  In other words, the possibility of powerful, outside forces actually sandbagging Louis' career is countered with strategic "love fests" to confuse and confound.

According to this carefully orchestrated narrative, signing up to be a judge on Simon Cowell's failed talent show, instead of releasing that long awaited album, seems completely normal. After all what does Louis care about moving forward with his music career when he can take three steps backward and return to where he started when he was 18. In this Kafkaesque world, what a treat for Louis to shelve his musical ambitions to work with  his mentor and "father figure" (blech), who has always been there to guide him. Right?



Oh, and let's not forget that Rob Stringer is the same guy who was announced as the next CEO of Sony Entertainment on October 18, 2016, while he was still the Chairman and CEO of Columbia Records. Coincidentally, Columbia Records was the label Harry Styles just happened to sign with a mere three months earlier on June 23, 2016.  The same record label that since 2012 had brutally closeted Louis and Harry while they were with One Direction. All the while creating an uber-hetero image for Louis from the very start, with a "supermodel" girlfriend that until this day he has been unable to shake.

And, let's not forget this little tidbit of conspiratorial serial coincidences from Billboard, (one of their "credible" sources being Cowell's mouthpiece, The Sun).  Published on August 25, 2015, while One Direction was still touring, the unexpected breakup story was already being planted in the media before 1D's fifth album had even been released in November. Moreover, the statement about Sony's exclusive interest in Harry Styles, appeared only one day after Niall and Louis had announced that the group was taking a temporary hiatus. The obvious intention to plant the seeds for blaming "narcissistic" Harry for the group splitting up. After all, Harry must have been sneaking behind the other boys' back (including Louis') negotiating with Sony all along. How else could an article like this appear only 24-hours after the group's hiatus announcement? With Louis saddled in baby stunt land in 2016, while Harry was rewarded with film stardom in Dunkirk, the stage was set for the dismantling of the formidable Larrie fandom through tried and true divide and conquer tactics. The meme that Harry gets everything and Louis nothing taking hold after years of disappointments and Sony/Syco "Solo Harry" narratives.

 

Sony Wants to Sign Harry Styles to Solo Deal 

 

Following reports of a 2016 hiatus for One Direction (which Niall Horan and Louis Tomlinson confirmed with tweets), The Sun reports that Sony is trying to sign Harry Styles to a "mega deal." Sony did not immediately reply to Billboard's request for confirmation.


Niall Horan Says One Direction is 'Not Splitting Up' But Will Take a Break Next Year

The Sun notes that top execs at Sony have made launching Styles' solo career their top priority for 2016. "Harry has always been One Direction’s most popular member and it’s obvious that we want to secure him -- he’s a global superstar," an anonymous Sony insider told The Sun. “Zayn will get to release an album first, as he left the band earlier, but the most excitement is about what Harry is going to do. Everyone wants to know what his solo material will sound like, there’s also a lot of pressure to get it right.”

Over the weekend, a One Direction spokesperson said they won't comment on "speculation." One Direction are currently touring until October. Their fifth studio album is expected in November. 


Although it's tempting to fall prey to the winner-loser narrative that's been expertly crafted for years (as early as 2012-2013), don't be fooled. We are witnessing the spinning cogs of the Music Industry at work. The same corporation that destroyed the likes of Michael Jackson. The same record label under which George Michael was closeted and, when unwilling to play the game anymore, saw his career implode in the 1990s because of ironclad contractual clauses. No coincidence that Harry had the lyrics, "Never Gonna" (R) "Dance Again" (L) tattooed along the ankle bones of his right and left foot sometime in June 2013. 





Sony, the same record label that has continued to aggressively closet Louis and Harry since One Direction's introduction to America in 2012.  Louis saddled with a "girlfriend" and a homophobic public image; Harry allowed to be LGBTQ-friendly, and eventually marketed as sexually open to anything, except Louis, of course. Rob Stringer and Simon Cowell who would love nothing more than to see Louis and Harry go their separate ways because that would be considered a win within their business model of indentured servitude. The same two music industry players who publicly can't seem to keep their grubby hands off of Louis Tomlinson, while covertly working to sabotage him from behind the scenes. 

Despite the challenges, even when times seem the bleakest, remember that the best disinfectant is always sunlight. And, that Larries continue to stan some pretty incredible shining stars who try, as often as they can, to light the way amid the darkness. Don't be fooled or distracted by shiny objects or confused by all the seemingly supportive professional displays of affection. What you are seeing is what Cowell and Stringer want you to see. Nothing more. Nothing less.


Triangles anyone?


                                        "Miss You" music video


Harry next to an upside down triangle 


 Pink Triangle and "Style" graffiti

1D final concert, Sheffield England October 31, 2015

PR narratives can't change this



pic sources:  Zimbio, Miss You music video stills, Daily Mail, Variety, Google Images
playlist: Fireproof - One Direction
              I Knew You Were Waiting for Me - Aretha Franklin &  
              George Michael
              Money - The Beatles  
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