Friday, August 31, 2018

The Summer of Jake Gyllenhaal and his "BFF" Austin Nichols - Huzzah!



Don't look now, but one of our fave Fab Duos, Austin Nichols and his cashmere-lovin' SO of 16 years, Jake Gyllenhaal, are putting themselves in the public position of both being across the pond AT THE SAME TIME.


Oh.  OOps!! shhhhh, we'll say it quietly.

Now, it remains to be seen whether or not the mere possibility of a crossing of the streams will continue to be allowed to exist, but for now, let's update everyone's Outlook calendar.  What's going on?

Well, Jake has been wandering around the UK and allegedly Greece since the spring, believe it or not.  Let's see. Where was he last photoshopped, I mean seen?  At a pub!  This was supposedly on Sunday, Aug 26.
A post shared by Jake Gyllenhaal Fan Acct (@jakeovereverything) on

And before that?  Well, this is supposed to be Jake (of course, from behind) walking in Greece with his girlfriend! How do we know this is his girlfriend? Because one of the planted comments tells us so!  Grab some binoculars and take a look.


 

I dunno......has anyone seen his dopelganger, Calgon, I mean Caglar lately?  Anyway, another space shuttle video for all to try to decipher.  And who shot that video?  What uncanny timing, huh?

 And let's not forget about this great Colorforms™ picture, which is supposed to be Jake swimming in the sea with someone and a human shark photobombing them, I think.  Here is Colorforms Jakers:

 Um, I think someone got a little carried away with the cropping and sliced Jake's profile a bit too close.  ;D  Of course, once again, we're not sure who it is that is supposed to have taken this photo, perhaps a passing fisherman?  Merman?  

Jake's also been taking in some theater when in London, spotted dining out and taking pictures with fellow WME/Endeavor client Burt Bacharach.  And although we're not sure when he posed for the shoot, the interview is for GQ France, the photographer named Shayne Laverdiere. [The photographer splits time between Montreal, Toronto and Paris.]  

Oh, filming, you say?  No, we don't have any Spidey set photos, sorry!  But plenty of other recreational and relaxation activities.

And what about Austin?  Well, he's been hammock swingin', 


visiting barber shops, drinking wine allegedly at a birthday party of an enabling Walking Dead former co-star:

 working out in a front yard,

working out with balcony railings,


 

standing under waterfalls in Hawaii, 

 

writing love poetry to former co-star Andrew Lincoln, pretending to attend an Oceana event (in front of yet another railing)


 
 
playing Olympian,


being part of a "perfect couple":


 

Colorforms™ Austin here standing with a male individual and getting part of his elbow snipped a little too close, a la Jake's swimming pic:

 
and standing at balconies,

Whoa!  ;-)

Well, we reckon it's pretty obvious to see why Austin had to turn down that co-lead part in the upcoming CW series, In the Dark, isn't it? He's just much too "busy". Although it does look like he is making ample use of that SAG card off screen. I wonder how residual payments are calculated for bearding projects? Something to ponder, indeed.

Then there was this little heads up a couple of days ago. Austin's flying! Of course we doubt whether he is really taking his long legs onto Southwest Airlines, but perhaps he simply felt like "stopping by" because he was running ahead of schedule and just wanted to take a pic to capture the moment? What a guy!


 

And Austin's throwing a few things into his carry-on and taking a hop, skip & a jump over to where?  To the Salento Film Festival, held in Tricase, Italy, where he will be squiring his beard Hassle "Hassie" Harrison around.

The Iron Orchard showing in Italy is sure coming in handy, isn't it? As the screenshot shows, Austin is going to be Q & A'ing with the beard on Saturday, Sept. 1.

And the hubs?  Well, might Jake just come out of paparazzi hiding in time for the Venice Film Festival, where his film The Sisters Brothers will show on September 2?

 September 1, Austin in Tricase, Italy......

 September 2, Jake in.....Venice, Italy.....

Austin in Tricase, Italy on Sept 1....

 Jake in Venice, Italy on Sept 2...

The only problem is that one of those other Jake blogs is telling everyone to cool their jets, because that ubiquitous anonymous commenter has inside information they generously "dropped by" to share with everyone:

"I read that neither Jake or Joaquin will attend Venice due to work Schedule, but I don't know if the info is right"

And of course, when you look at the official poster released yesterday Aug 30, well, Jake's nowhere to be seen:

 

With this in mind, it's likely Jake is not on screen that much, which of course would offer an explanation for not showing up at Venice either.  Apparently, Jake has developed a phobia about film festivals, barring Toronto, hasn't he?  

NONEtheless, we hope Jake and Austin enjoyed their "we" time in Hawaii, perhaps taking their treehouse and hot tub proclivities to the "isolated" Aloha side of Hana, Maui.  Their very own version of hanging loose. Mahalo, baby!

Meanwhile, the rest of us get to enjoy the "scenery" of gymnast rings, balcony leaning, and human shark photobombing.  LOL!!

As we wrap up, on a more analytical, serious note amidst some of the chortling and laser pointing, notice the trend with both Jake and Austin.  For Austin, there have been Walker Stalker convention participations in London, One Tree Hill in France, supposed travels to Portugal and Hawaii.  For Jake?  What is alleged to be a long filming stint where and during what season (the summer)?  London.  Placement in Greece.  In 2017, The Sisters Brothers was supposed to film where and when?  Almaria, Spain and when?  The summer.  In Spain, even though the story actually is to take place in Oregon and San Francisco, but instead the production goes all the way to Spain?

And yet, we have more alleged "out and about" photos of Jake from overseas than we ever see anymore when he's supposed to be in the States. Notice the beards his team has paired him with.  In 2016, it was Katja Tausig. Where is she from?  London.  His bearding photo op with Katja came on the heels of filming Life with Ryan Reynolds and when was this?  During the summer. In London.

Also seen with a British born gal Anna Libon in Chelsea, London in 2015.  During what month?  June.  Bearded heavily with Greta Caruso where?  In Italy at the very end of May 2015 and St. Bart's during New Year's 2017. While she is American, these were two extended "vacations" and they weren't on American soil.  

The latest beard?  "Jeanne Cadieu" from Montreal, Quebec.  If it's not London, Italy or France for Jake and Austin, there's a Montreal, Vancouver or Toronto connection.  Where is he alleged photo'd with her? Overseas.  


And how about Big Sis, Maggie?  Whom we haven't seen all summer either?  Where's she been hiding?  Well, here's where WME/Endeavor is working at placing her ('working at' is used in the most lenient of terms!)


 

Oh look...also during the summer.  Of 2017.


 

2016?  Vermont.  When?  The summer.

  

Oh, and look, even in 2015!


 

Even though we have no pictures, of course because well, there are not paps in Vermont, are there?  How fortunate for Big Sis and the alleged, ne'er-seen-anymore Peter Sarsgaard!  ;-)  Guess that was great thinking on "their" part, wasn't it? This summer, Mgmnt came up with a legitimate reason for them to actually be in Vermont:

A rare, public appearance today for the "couple".

 In this August 19, 2018, Just Jared post, notice what is said:

The 40-year-old The Deuce actress was spotted picking up some pastries on the way back to her hotel on Sunday (August 19) in New York City. - "back to her hotel"

Odd.  Not back to the brownstone?

Neither sibling is even selling "living" in New York City anymore.  It's not difficult to arrive at the conclusion that Jake, Austin, their kids, Maggie and her daughters and likely the matriarch, Naomi Foner, are rarely in the United States anymore, let alone New York City.  They're spending the majority of their lives now beyond the borders.  Notice how pap agencies are rarely used anymore with Jake.  He's seen in Instagram pictures. Hinky looking "twit" pictures.   

Secrets to hide like a communal lifestyle, a marriage between Jake and Austin, and real life fatherhood for two men who are supposed to be swinging bachelors.  Aaaah yes.  

Hello, reality.


via GIPHY



pic source:  pinterest, IHJ, giphy, Google maps, Salento Film
                   Festival, Mrwgifs, Univ of Toronto
our playlist: Musetta's Waltz - Moonstruck soundtrack
                   It Must Be Him - Vicki Carr
                   Stornelli amorosi - Claudio Villa
                  
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1 comment:

prairiegirl said...

That "swimming photo" is so lousy. Jake looks like The Phantom Of the Opera with only half of his face visible.

And same with Austin's elbow in that picture with the good looking young fellow. It's got an abrupt slant to it. Someone needs to work on their photoshopping skills, lol.

That's quite a bit of reading, isn't it? ;-) Thanks to M&M for the editing help!

Friday, August 31, 2018 at 9:45:00 PM CDT

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