Friday, September 16, 2016

Blame It On the "L's"

Scuzzy maneuvers at some of its worst.

First Liam Payne's twitter account tweets this:


 

And M&M joined some of the sharp Larries in quickly identifying the pool as the one included in a picture of a $10 million property that Louis Tomlinson was said to have purchased back in February.  Queue many fans bubbling with excitement at the prospect of Liam having fun jumping in Louis' pool and the idea of these guys having some much deserved splashin' social time together with one or two of the other band members? 

This tumblr shows a great comparison pic of the pools:


http://buscandoelparaiso.tumblr.com/post/150506236413/apparently-liam-is-at-louis-10m-house-liams-new
 

Enter....the grim reapers (aka Simon Cowell and his henchwoman, Anne-Marie Thomson).

The manipulation begins with a planted seed from yesterday, 9/15:


 

And then today, after the excitement of seeing Liam leaping into the pool, of what was "supposed" to have been Louis' house, comes this glaring revelation from out of nowhere:

Liam Payne (NOT Louis Tomlinson) Buys $10 Million Calabasas House

Posted on February 24, 2016

With this edited paragraph:

 

EDIT (9/16/16): It has come to our attention (via many, many Directioners) who have alerted us to the fact that this is not Mr. Tomlinson’s house. In actuality, this is Mr. Liam Payne’s house. It seems some wires got crossed somewhere along the way. We pride ourselves on being accurate, but even we get it wrong on occasion. Since Mr. Payne & Mr. Tomlinson both have first names starting with the letter “L”, we’re gonna blame it on that. Yolanda sincerely apologizes for her grievous mistake and we’re enjoying a big slice of humble pie right at this very moment. (Please don’t skewer us!) 

 

It seems some wires got crossed, AKA Mistakes Were Made 

 

Even more amusing is the reason Yolanda, the self-identified real estate professional, gives for editing her post today.

 

"It has come to our attention (via many, many Directioners) who have alerted us to the fact that this is not Mr. Tomlinson’s house."

 

That makes sense doesn't it? A reliable real estate person told Yolanda the house was bought by Louis, but when 4-5 anonymous "Directioners" told her she was wrong, she saw the light immediately and changed her post today.  If you believe this hogwash, I have some swampland I would like to sell to you.

 

The other narrative that is being pushed here by Cowell is that Liam is about to become a daddy just like Louis. Headlines have been appearing all week about his fake girlfriend being pregnant. How very predictable. Because a 10,000 square foot house doesn't make sense for a single young man, but it does, if he is buying the property for his loved up "girlfriend." Remember the original February headline read:  Louis Tomlinson Buys a $10 Million Calabasas crib for his baby mama. Now we get this:

 

Liam Payne Makes A Splash 

 

It is obvious how desperate Simon Cowell is right now. He is doing his utmost to take down One Direction for having the audacity to leave him for real freedom. Ol' Uncle Si is just showing his true colors because he is personally a pathetic, vindictive, narcissistic, control freak. Sorry, Simon. Your days are coming to an end.  Looks like you will have to find some other suckers to firm up those pec implants in the future. Buh-bye. 

 

  BREAKING NEWS    BREAKING NEWS    BREAKING NEWS   BREAKING NEWS

 

Yolanda has just updated her newsflash a-gain. Apparently, our suddenly confused real estate In The Know is now completely rescinding her edits from earlier in the evening. After consulting with her trustworthy Source, she can reconfirm Louis Tomlinson is indeed the owner of that 10 million house.


EDIT again (9/16/16): Some fans think we’re crazy but though we briefly amended this post earlier (and received quite a bit of flak for doing so), we just got off the phone with Mr. Deep Throat who refused to budge and was absolutely adamant that this is Mr. Tomlinson’s estate and NOT Liam Payne’s. “Poppycock!” he said when we told him how many, many Directioners have been saying we were wrong (okay, he didn’t actually use that exact word). We know Mr. Deep Throat and he is not the type of person who tells lies. So we’re editing this post back to its original form. Hate as you please, but Yolanda’s had enough for tonight. We’ll be at the nearest alcohol-serving establishment, thankyouverymuch.
 

Whew! That was quite a turnaround, don't you think? Of course Yolanda still hasn't explained why she didn't check with her reputable source before taking the word of 4-5 Directioners that Liam actually owned this house. One likely explanation might be that Uncle Si takes great joy in screwing around with the Larrie fandom, but he doesn't want a wider Internet audience to know what he is up to in real time.  As a result, perhaps Cowell thought it best to cover his tracks as quickly as possible. Hard to discern with so much confusion being spread. Guess we'll have to see whether the spin will be continued by the media tomorrow. If more details are revealed, then we might see if there are any further clues as to what's really going on behind the scenes. Thank you for your time. We will now return to our regularly scheduled programming.  #BigGayWar

 

 

 

Collaboration:  Prairie Girl and Methodical Muser 

source credits: buscandoelparaiso Tumblr, yolandaslittleblackbook

Song:  Fireproof - One Direction

 

2 comments:

Methodical Muser said...


That was a wild ride last night. It's always fun to see a stunt unfold in real time. Simon Cowell has definitely made One Direction into a mystery wrapped in an enigma. And, the guys have had to learn creative ways to counter those false images he has tried to sell over the last six years. The kind of damage Cowell loves to inflict on those he deems to be disloyal always has to be factored into any speculation. Particularly, right now as the group's contractual obligations are winding down. Cowell obviously still has image rights over 1D, and therefore control over that image. He will continue to inflict as much damage as he can and paint himself the victim whenever possible.

Even a simple real estate transaction becomes fodder for selling multiple, often times, conflicting narratives. My best guess is that it's quite possible that all four members own that 10 million dollar compound because that really is what the property is. The property is 5 acres and the main house is 10,000 square feet. In addition there are two guest houses on site and a meditation tea house. That's right, a meditation tea house. Soooo Louis and Harry.

The actual property is owned by LXA LLC. In turn, another company owns LXA LLC. Lots of pics were posted back in June and then a month or so later these same accounts were taken down with messages like "Account Removed" and "This account has been removed by the owner". Another clue that the info leaked was done on purpose and for a reason. The only mystery is why?

Methodical Muser said...


The latest headline about Liam and his fake girlfriend:

Nursery is Ready

By the way, for those who aren't aware, Cheryl Cole (aka Cheryl Fernandez-Versini) has been rumored to be in a same sex relationship with Kimberley Walsh for years. The couple are referred to as Chim.

Kimberly gave birth to a baby in early September 2014 with her publicized "long-term boyfriend" Justin Scott. Cheryl married in July 2014. Divorced 18 months later. Then Kimberly married her "boyfriend" in February 2016. Then Cheryl started her fake relationship with Liam in late February 2016. Baby rumors started circulating in June. And the wheel goes round and round. Sound familiar?

Btw: Kimberly Walsh belonged to the group, Girls Aloud and was a Syco artist, just like Cheryl Cole Fernandez-Versini. Small world, innit?